Ultraviolet
by Aiedail01
Summary: He wrapped his arms around me. Then I saw a flash of white, the flash of his teeth, as he leaned towards my neck." Bella and Edward's wedding, vampire-ness, and beyond. Rated T for language. Enjoy!
1. Preface

Preface

I am really into Twilight right now... so I wrote this, my first Twilight Fic. I can't say it's going to be good, and I will try my hardest to make everyone in character. Hope you like it!!

The song "Ultraviolet" is by Alexz Johnson... all of her songs together inspired this story, especially Ultraviolet ("It's too late for me now/ because your love's like ultraviolet /I can feel it burn but I like it").

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**Ultraviolet**

Preface

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I was hyperventilating.

I was sweating, despite the cool temperature, I was jumpy, bouncing up and down in my heels, and I was nervous as hell. And I still had an hour to go.

There were two reasons I hadn't run screaming from the Cullen's house hours ago. One was the fact that Alice Cullen was willing to hold my arm in a death grip if I tried.

The other was the thought of Edward. He'd wanted this, so much, and I didn't want to disappoint him. No, I couldn't disappoint him. I wanted him to be happy. And as much as I'd disliked the idea at first, it had slowly warmed up to me. Not that I would ever admit it.

Today we were getting married.

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The next chapters will be long. Review, please!


	2. I Can't Believe it's Morning

Thanks for the review!! I would appreciate more, though...

Here's chapter 1. It was originally just called "Morning" but I was like, screw that, I'll have exciting chapter titles. This one is from "That Was Us" by Alexz Johnson ("I can't believe it's morning / I can't believe it's pouring / Should I leave you here and walk away?")

I hope you like it!

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**Ultraviolet**

Chapter 1: I Can't Believe it's Morning

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I hadn't slept well the night before. Edward was there, which helped significantly. I'd talked to him until midnight, before he finally insisted that I should go to sleep. I shook my head, telling him no. But he didn't say anything after that. I sighed and snuggled against his chest, but my eyes would not close. I tossed and turned all night, drifting off for minutes at a time, my eyes springing open as I remembered what would happen the next day.

I was so anxious. No doubt I would trip walking down the isle. I would do something wrong, I would screw up the vows. I couldn't let that happen. I wanted so badly for this to be perfect, for him.

When I finally couldn't stand lying in bed anymore, around 8:30, I threw off the covers. He smiled, amused. I glared at him. I paced the house, he followed. I walked up and down the stairs, wandering in circles. He watched me the whole time, laughing quietly to himself.

I didn't know what to do with myself for the 6 and a half hours before I would go to the Cullens'. I started off by cleaning. I made it through my room, then down the hall, the bathroom, the kitchen, the living room. We barely talked that whole time, but he understood. I was afraid of what would come out of my mouth. He just watched me clean, smiling softly.

I waited until I heard Charlie stumble sleepily into the shower, around 10, before I started the vacuum. It was loud, and distracting, and it kept me from thinking about what would happen at 8 p.m. today.

As we heard the shower turn off, it was time for him to leave. He wrapped his arms around me. I relaxed into his firm chest, breathing him in. "Will you come back?"

He shook his head. "Alice is having me set up all day. I won't see you until tonight." I sighed sadly. He leaned down and kissed to top of my head, burying his face in my hair. "I love you," he said, and disappeared.

"I love you, too." He was already gone, but I knew he could hear me.

I resumed cleaning, my thoughts wandering.

Alice had wanted to throw me a bachlorette party the night before, but I had straight up refused. She was pushing it already with this whole wedding planner role, she knew, but that didn't keep her from sneaking in more outrageous requests. She'd immediately given up on that idea, she'd seen that I wouldn't budge on it.

I wrapped the cord around the vacuum and returned it to its storage space in the hall closet.

What now?

I headed to the sparkling clean kitchen, and pulled out the carton of eggs. I would make breakfast for Charlie. I pulled a pan out of the cupboard, set it on the stove, and turned the heat on underneath. Once it was hot enough, I cracked two eggs in the pan and let them fry. I rummaged in the refrigerator until I found a package of bacon. I laid two strips in the pan next to the eggs. They sizzled and crackled, grease flying off. A giant splatter landed on my face.

"OW!" I cried, and ran to the sink, pressing a wet dish towel to the spot on my forehead where it had burned.

I sighed. Please let this be the worst of my bad luck today.

I heard Charlie's feet thudding down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Morning, Bella." he said, giving me a quick but tight hug. It wasn't something he usually did, but I knew why today. He sat down at the table, grinning at me.

I pulled out a plate and slid the eggs and bacon onto it, then set it in the table in front of him. I poured orange juice into two glasses, then sat down next to him.

"You didn't have to make me breakfast!" he said. "Thanks, honey." He immediately dug into the food, shoveling it into his mouth.

I sat and watched, nervously sipping juice.

"You're not eating?" he asked, concerned.

I shook my head. "Too nervous. If I eat anything, I'll probably throw up."

He smiled at me again. "Listen, Bella."

Oh, no, he was going to get all sentimental.

"Don't worry so much. I may think you're too young to get married, but Edward loves you. And you love him. And there's no reason to be nervous." He sniffed a little.

I winced. _Hold it in, Charlie,_ I prayed.

"It's just... you're my baby girl, and you're growing up so fast. And I don't want to lose you."

"You won't," I said quietly. "Thanks, Charlie."

He nodded, pleased he'd gotten this part over with.

"So, what are you up to today?" he asked casually.

"Well, aside from the obvious," I began, "I don't know. Alice is making me come over at two to get ready, but I don't know what to do until then."

He nodded, then even more casually, "Is Jake going to the wedding?"

I bit my lip, cringed. "...I don't know."

Charlie nodded again. "Hmm."

I sighed. I knew what that meant. I cleared Charlie's plate and our glasses, put them in the dishwasher, then headed upstairs. I pulled on jeans and a t-shirt, some sneakers, and grabbed a jacket. I brushed my hair back and twisted it into a bun.

"I'm heading down to La Push," I called to Charlie as I walked out the door.

I started my truck. It was as loud as ever and I backed it out of the driveway.

I was nervous the whole way to La Push. I drove slowly, afraid of what would happen when I got there.

I wanted Jake to be at the wedding, but I knew that would hurt him. I couldn't stand hurting him anymore than I had already, anymore than I would be hurting him when I became one of them, his enemy.

I knew I was making the right choice by marrying Edward. I was absolutely sure. But that didn't stop me from loving Jake, from wishing I could be so absolutely selfish and have them both. I wished Jake had only thought of me as a friend, that he had never loved me as more.

I parked the truck and knocked on the door. "Come in!" yelled Billy from inside. I pushed open the door. Billy sat, watching TV and eating cereal.

"Hi," I said nervously. "Is Jacob around?"

Billy shrugged. "I don't know. He was pretty upset when he woke up this morning. He took off, I haven't seen him since." That tore at my heart. I felt my stomach drop.

"Billy..." I said slowly. "I'm really sorry. I just want you to know that. I really love you guys a lot. And I hate that I'm hurting all of you."

Billy shrugged again. "It's your choice- I'm not going to be mad at you for that. I hate how it's hurting Jake, too. Just be careful." He sighed. "Look, he might be at the beach."

"Thanks, Billy," I turned towards the door, but then looked back. "It would mean so much to me if you came today," I said sincerely.

"We'll see," he said. I smiled, and left. I made my way down to the beach.

I scanned it quickly before running down. Jacob Black sat on a log, his face in his hands, his silky hair, hanging around his face. It was shorter now, but still long enough to fall past his ears.

I knew he heard me coming, but he didn't turn to look. I walked forward, slower now. When I was next to him, I sat down. He didn't respond.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"What?" he asked, looking up suddenly, furiously. "Why are you here?"

I stared at him, shocked. I understood what he felt. It couldn't possibly hurt him as much as it had hurt me when Edward left, but I could guess that it was close. I could see anger burning in his eyes, but at the same time, unmistakable sadness.

"Jake." I brushed hair out of my eyes. I wanted desperately to hug him, to brush my fingers along his arm, but I couldn't touch him. I didn't want to make it harder for him.

"I'm surprised the bloodsucker let you come here," he bit at me. "Or, let me guess, he doesn't know?" He laughed shortly, but there was no happiness in the sound. "He should have kept better tabs on you. Who knows what I could do? I might lose control, I might just kidnap you."

Fear brewed in my stomach, but I pushed it away. Jake wouldn't do that. Would he?

He snarled quietly, turned away.

"Jake, please. Stop it."

He cursed under his breath, and whipped his head around again. "Damnit, Bella, I can't! Why should I? Do you know what this is doing to me? Can you even imagine it?"

I could. But I didn't answer.

I reached out tentatively, I couldn't help myself. He grabbed my wrist, squeezing hard. "Don't. Touch. Me," he spit. He dropped my arm, saw the charm bracelet. The bracelet he'd given me for my graduation birthday, with the little wolf charm he'd made himself. "You're still wearing this?" he asked. "Why? Do you feel guilty?"

"That's not why I wear it! I love this bracelet! I love that you made this for me, Jake. I think of you every time I wear it. It makes me miss you less."

He scoffed. "Right." He grabbed my wrist again, staring at the sparkling heart charm on the opposite side of the wooden wolf. "And why is this on here, too?" he asked.

"He gave it to me... so I could think of him, too," I said quietly.

"You already think of him constantly! Give it a rest. Bella, I can't even begin to tell you how much I can't stand you right now! You're so damn selfish."

I winced, tears pooling in the corners of my eyes. "I know."

"You can't just have part of me, or part of him. You have to have us both." He threw my arm down disgustedly. I didn't react. My arm bounced off of my thigh and hung limply at my side.

We sat in silence for awhile. I started at my lap. Jake stared out at the water.

Finally, he spoke, quietly now. "Why did you pick him, Bella? I beat myself up about this every day... why him and not me?"

I didn't know what to say.

He shook his head.

"I'm sorry," I said, my voice breaking. It didn't make anything better. But he should know that I was. "And, I know you hate me, but you don't have an idea how much it would mean to me to have you there... at the wedding."

"How can you ask me that, Bella?" he asked incredulously.

"I don't know." My voice was too small, too weak. "I'm sorry. I love you."

"But not enough."

I stood up. "Goodbye, Jake." I wanted to hug him, but I held it in as I walked away. I held in my tears until I was safely in my truck. I cried for a long time, I wasn't sure how long I sat in their driveway with tears pouring down my face.

This struck me as odd. Would this be the last time I would ever cry? My last crying experience, and it was over Jake.

Suddenly, I was mad. It was hard for me, too. Not just him. Why couldn't he understand? I never asked him to love me, I made it absolutely clear that we were only friends. I rolled my eyes. I hoped I would cry out of happiness at this damn wedding.

I took a deep breath, remembering that today might be the last time I would need to do that, too.

I checked my watch. 1 o clock. I couldn't stand waiting around anymore. I turned the keys in the ignition and backed out of the driveway. I would just go to the Cullens' now.

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Lame chapter ending, but whatever. Haha. I'll update soon, hopefully!


	3. I Hope it's Enough

I knocked on the front door of the great house

This chapter title is from Perfect by Alexz Johnson ("The best I can do is to be myself / I hope it's enough to make you proud.") Kinda lame, but I couldn't think of anything else.

Thanks for the reviews!!

And Lacey- thanks for the thing about aisle!! I knew there was something wrong with the way I spelled it, but I couldn't figure it out. And I hope I got this up in time for you!

modernxxmyth- The Jacob situation will work out. Haha. I've got a plan for that. And I know!! That Was Us was soo sad. I'm kind of irritated at Jude right now... she's just being annoying. And Tommy's also being annoying. I wish they would just get over themselves and get back together or something. But Jamie and Zeppelin are awesome. I'm happy about that! Okay, well that's enough Instant Star for now. Haha,

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**Ultraviolet**

**  
Chapter 2: I Hope It's Enough**

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I knocked on the front door of the great house. I was early, and I hoped at least someone was home.

Edward opened the door. My eyes lit up when I saw him. He pulled me inside, and held me tight. Then he pushed me back to look at me. "You've been crying." It wasn't a question.

"It's nothing." I brushed it off. "Just something with Jake."

"What?" he asked. "What happened?"

"Nothing..." He continued to stare at me, not letting me off easily. "I just went to talk to him, and I shouldn't have. It just made me upset, and mad, and now I just want to forget about it."

He nodded. It was a good enough explanation. He kissed my hair.

"Where's Alice?" I asked.

He laughed, that beautiful, musical laugh. "Now you want her to fuss over you?"

"No," I said, pursing my lips. "Now I'm trying to figure out if she's gone so we can go to Vegas and get this over with."

His eyes looked hurt. "I was kidding," I said quickly. "Really... I'm not _so_ against this anymore."

He grabbed me around the waist and twirled me. "Bella Swan," he said. "Are you telling me that you really want to marry me?"

I stared at him. "No. I just said I didn't hate the idea."

He grinned. "You do want to marry me."

"I never said that!" He laughed and twirled me again.

"So where is Alice?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"I don't know, I think picking something up. Maybe the cake? No, Esme made the cake"

"And what have _you _been doing all day?"

"Setting up, like I told you. Alice has been having me set up tables and other such things out back," he said nonchalantly.

"How long did that take you? Three minutes?" I laughed. We'd decided to have the wedding at the Cullens', out back by the woods.

"Two, actually." He grinned. Then his face faltered. "Alice is coming."

I sighed. "What does she want?"

He was quiet for a minute. "She wants to put makeup on you, and she just bought a... curling iron?"

Great. Something I could get burned on.

She danced into the room where we stood, although she looked somewhat stressed out. "Edward!" She thrust a list at his face. "Go do something on this list."

He laughed. "I pick number one-twenty-three. Get Bella into her wedding dress."

Alice rolled her eyes. "Haha, very funny. Go." She twisted his shoulders around and pushed him towards the back door.

"Ready to get ready?" she asked, grinning and bouncing on her toes.

"No."

"Great!" She pulled my hand and whisked me up the stairs.

"You have One hundred and twenty-three things on your list for the wedding?"

"Two hundred, actually. And that's just the things to do _today._"

"Alice! I told you not to go overboard."

"I didn't," she said simply.

I sighed. "What number are you on now?"

"One-twelve. Start getting Bella ready." She pulled me upstairs to the bathroom and turned on the shower, flicking the faucet handles quickly until the water was the right temperature. "Get in. Wash your hair." She shut the door behind me and left, off to do who knew what.

I sighed.

I emerged from the shower ten minutes later, a towel wrapped around my body and another on my hair. Alice's shampoo smelled lovely, like cinnamon and vanilla and sugar.

"Put on the robe," Alice called through the door. I jumped. Had she been standing outside the whole time? I put on the purple bathrobe hanging on the back of the bathroom door.

Alice threw open the door and dragged me to her room. She sat me down on a stool and plugged in the hair dryer.

My thoughts wandered as Alice dragged the whirring hair dryer through strand after strand of my lifeless hair. I thought of Jake, the pain in his eyes. I wanted him to be here. I wanted to talk to him. I stared at the window. The blinds were closed, only letting a sliver of light shine through.

I would miss the sunlight when I changed.

That thought was sudden, and I regretted it. It made my decision seem... less sure. And I was sure, I knew that I was.

I thought of Renee and Phil, who were being picked up at the airport by Charlie at 3. I would miss her, too. Maybe... once I was in control of my... thirst, I could visit her. Wear long sleeves and long pants, brush on a little bronzer. Maybe some brown contacts. I would still look like me, wouldn't I?

I wouldn't be clumsy anymore. When I visited, I wouldn't be dropping and breaking everything within sight. I wouldn't be tripping. And no more trips to the hospital emergency room. I grinned a little. That would be nice.

And when we were together, when I was with them, I wouldn't slow them down. No one would have to slow down for me, and no one would have to carry me. I could run as fast, if not faster.

I remembered what he'd said before.

"_Will I be stronger than you?"_

"Yes."

I smiled giddily. Stronger than Edward... that would be interesting. He couldn't push me away when we kissed...

But then again, he wouldn't need to be careful anymore. There would be no blood left for him to thirst after. Or for anyone else to thirst after, either. I remembered my birthday party, those two years ago, when I had sliced my finger on the wrapping paper and caused five, normally in-control vampires to go crazy.

That wouldn't be a problem anymore.

Alice dropped the dryer and began finger combing my hair. "Ow, Alice!" I cried as she tugged on a snag. She darted away, returned with a portable phone in hand.

"It's for you," she said, dropping it in my lap and resuming her place behind me, this time with a brush.

Funny, I hadn't even heard it ring. I pressed it to my ear. "Hello?" No one answered. Suddenly, it began ringing. I shrieked, the piercing sound of the ringer right in my ear.

"Alice," I grumbled, pressing the on button. "I think I might be deaf." She laughed quietly, musically. "Hello?" I said again.

"Bella?" It was Angela. She sounded sad, a little hysterical.

"Mm-hmm. Hi, Angela!"

"I called your house but you weren't there and Charlie told me to call here so I did and Ben just broke up with me!" she forced out in a rush.

"Oh, Angela, I'm sorry!" I said. She and Ben had been going out for awhile, I knew how much she liked him. "Did he tell you why?"

She was crying now. "He just said... that he wanted space... and, I don't know... I don't remember. I couldn't pay attention after he said that we should see other people."

My heart ached for her. Angela and I weren't extremely close, but she had always been sweet and friendly. She put up with me when I was crazy, and she was willing to talk to me when no one else would.

"Why don't you come over now?" I said. "To the Cullens', I mean. Alice is pampering me beyond belief, I'm sure she can get you ready, too."

Alice's face lit up.

Angela's voice faltered as she spoke. "Um, I don't know." I could tell she was nervous around the Cullens, as most people were. "I don't know if I can go to the wedding."

"What? Angela, please! You have too! You're one of my best friends, I can't imagine this without you." It was true, I knew it as I said it. I would miss Angela, too, when I changed.

"I'm really a mess right now..." she said, her voice still hesitant. "I don't know."

"Please, Angela, please. Just come over, Alice and I will distract you," I didn't know what I was saying, but I couldn't let Angela sit at home and dwell on Ben.

She sighed. "Well... okay."

"Great!" I said enthusiastically. "Come over, bring your outfit, or you can borrow something of Alice's if you need to. We'll see you soon!"

"Bye, Bella. And thank you." She hung up.

"Yay, yay, yay!" Alice cried. She bounced a little on her toes.

When Angela arrived, she was escorted up the stairs by a very happy Alice, and she couldn't help but smile.

Alice teased our hair, brushed product after product onto our faces, all the while chattering happily.

Angela and I sat, mostly quiet, answering questions as Alice fired them at us.

Finally, we were done. Alice showed us the mirror. I stared, in absolute awe, my breath caught in my throat.

My hair fell in soft waves around my face, suddenly shiny. It looked like a rich chocolate brown, instead of the usual flat color. My skin was still pale, but there was a rosy glow to it, like I was constantly blushing. But not in an embarrassing way, more of a sweet, shy way. My eyelashes- who knew they were that long? They had to be fake. My eyes look big, and friendly, and pretty. They were surrounded in shimmery bronze.

Angela looked just as amazing. She smiled, her eyes shining, touched her hair.

"Wow..." I trailed off. "Thanks, Alice."

Alice grinned, knowingly. She thought for a minute. "Okay. We still have two hours. I need to go check on things and arrange things, and... No! What are you doing?" She ran out of the room, intent on keeping something she'd see in a vision from happening.

Angela looked confused. "Is she always like this?"

I rolled my eyes. "All the time."

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Lame chapter ending. I feel like I'm just making filler chapters. I want the wedding to be its own separate chapter, but I have some more stuff to put in before that. And I didn't want to make the chapters painstakingly long... Mehhh. Whatever.

Enjoy, and review!


	4. She's So Pretty, But She's Not Sure

Alice darted back into the room

Thanks for the reviews!! Lots of smiles and hugs are being handed out. Yayy!

This chapter title is modified from "White Houses" by Vanessa Carlton (She's so pretty and she's so sure / Maybe I'm more clever than a a girl like her)

Um, um, um. Most of this chapter is filler, but the conversation with Alice is what is important, I guess. Hopefully the rest is entertaining enough to mix in with the important parts.

So I just want to give a basic outline for this story- I'd like to do the wedding, and then her becoming a vampire, and then some vampire-ness after that. Maybe an epilogue of her living with the Cullens in like a hundred years? I don't know. Let me know what you think, or if you have any ideas.

I'd like it to be a long story, but I have a feeling it's going to be 6-10 chapters long. Which is pretty long for me, so yeah. Whatever.

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**Ultraviolet**

**  
Chapter 3: She's So Pretty, But She's Not Sure**

--

As Angela and I talked in Alice's room, I felt the butterflies in my stomach. I don't think they'd ever left- more like Alice's makeover had temporarily made me unable to feel them.

I was marrying Edward in a matter of hours... and in a matter of hours after that, I would become a vampire. I trembled, with excitement mostly, but also a little fear. I wanted to know what it would be like, what it would feel like. How I would be different.

There was a little tiny inkling of a thought poking at the back of my mind like a razor-sharp pin.

_What if he didn't love me anymore?_

It was irrational, I knew. And he'd told me so many times, he would always love me. I knew I would always love him, but what if I was so different... that he didn't want me? Hadn't he said that my being clumsy, and the way I blushed made him love me more?

What would happen when I never tripped or hurt myself, or when there was no blood in my cheeks to cause the scarlet flush?

And he wouldn't need to protect me anymore. That was one thing I loved about Edward- he was always protecting me. When I was with him, I felt safe. I was so vulnerable and small, and I needed him there.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of this stupid, stupid thought.

Angela sat on the rug, staring at her nails. I realized she had been talking, and I hadn't been responding.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ang..."

"It's okay," she whispered. "I know you're nervous about the wedding. I'm just moping about Ben more..." She tried to force a smile.

I felt awful. I leaned over and gave her a somewhat awkward hug. "Do you want to talk anymore?"

She shook her head. "Not really."

Alice darted back into the room. "I have so many things to do..." she mumbled to herself, staring at her list. She bit her lip, tapped the list with a black pen. She gasped. "I forgot to do number ten, and we're up to one-fifteen!" She tapped her foot anxiously. "I've got to get the food ready... and then the tables..."

I wasn't sure if she was talking to us or not. "Anything we can help with, Alice?"

She sighed. "No, Bella, it's your wedding, you don't have to do anything." She thought for a minute. "You." She pointed to Angela. "Can you frost cupcakes?"

Angela looked confused, and rather intimidated. "Umm..."

"Come with me." Alice pulled Angela towards the door.

"Alice! No!" I ran after them. When I finally made it down the stairs, Alice was in the kitchen, handing Angela a spatula. On the table in front of them were hundreds of cupcakes.

"What is this?" I asked incredulously.

"Your wedding cake," Alice said. "Well, not yet, obviously." She was setting two bowls of icing in front of Angela, one chocolate, one vanilla. "Just put it on. It's easy, doesn't take a genius. I've got to go find Edward and Jasper and Emmett... more tables... Esme? Where?" She ran from the room.

"Sorry about this," I said to Angela sheepishly as I picked up a spatula, ignoring Alice's orders not to help. I dipped it in the chocolate frosting and began spreading it on the nearest cupcake.

"It's okay," she said, spreading vanilla frosting on another cupcake. "Alice really is... something."

I laughed, nodding in agreement. I finished icing the cupcake and set it down, reaching for another. I realized that this was going to take quiet awhile.

"Thanks for inviting me over." Angela smiled genuinely, coating her spatula with a gob of vanilla frosting. "It really helped."

I smiled to myself. We continued frosting the cupcakes for what seemed like hours. "My hands are cramping..." I winced, twisting my wrist in an attempt to loosen it up.

"I didn't want to say anything, but I can't feel my arms anymore," Angela said. I laughed.

"Bella..." said a voice behind me, a beautiful, thick, velvet voice.

I turned around. His eyes were staring at my face, taking in the makeup and the hair, and before I knew it, his lips were on mine and I was melting.

"Bella," he murmured in my ear. "You are so beautiful."

I opened my eyes for a second, trying not to faint. I saw Angela, looking extremely uncomfortable.

"Angela just got dumped," I whispered to him. "Can we do this later?"

He immediately responded by scooping me up and carrying me into the hallway. He set me down and pressed his lips to mine again, and again, and again.

I finally pulled away, trying to give myself a minute to restart my heart. "Why so kissy today?" I asked, beaming like a crazy person. "I mean, not that I mind..." But he usually wasn't like this.

He grinned, a wicked gleam in his eye. "We need to practice. We're going to be doing this in front of probably the entire town of Forks in about... two hours."

I groaned. Kissing Edward in front of Charlie? I didn't think Charlie would be able to handle that. I rolled my eyes, but kissed him again. I wrapped my eyes around his neck, pulling myself as close to him as possible. He held me tight, his hands around my waist.

He finally pulled away, and we just stood in the middle of his house, holding each other.

"Bella..." Every time he said my name, it sounded like a song. "You're going to be my _wife_ soon."

I pushed him away gently. "Aww, Edward! Why'd you have to ruin it?" But I was laughing. He reached for my hand, and kissed the gold ring that was on my fourth finger.

At that moment, Alice made her way into the room. "What are you doing?" she demanded, and pulled Edward backward away from me. I stared at her- usually she was much more polite about this.

"Go... do something!" She thrust the list towards him one more time. "Bella, we've got to get ready!" Her face went blank for a minute. "No, Edward, you can _not_ see her until the wedding! Don't even try coming through that window. I just saw you trying, and guess what happened? I pushed you out and you fell down two stories. It's really too bad you weren't hurt."

He shook his head. "Sometimes I can't stand her..." he muttered as he wrapped his arms around me. "So this is good bye for now, love. I'll see you later, when you walk down the aisle?"

"Mm-hmm." Hopefully. If I didn't pass out from nerves by then.

He kissed me one more time, on my forehead, and breathed in deeply. "I love you." And he was gone.

Alice herded me upstairs. Angela was suddenly with us, and we – well, I - was tripping over my own feet as I was rushed up each stair. All I could think of was his lips on mine, how he smelled, his eyes...

"Ready, Bella?" Alice asked, her eyes shining, when we were finally in her room.

I nodded meekly. "Don't let me near ANYTHING that can possibly be spilled," I ordered.

She pulled out the white garment bag, unzipped it. My breath caught in my throat. I'd forgotten how _pretty_ the dress was. It was simple, but still gorgeous. Not frilly, but still delicate and lacy. I couldn't comprehend how Alice had figured out my taste so well.

She zipped me into the dress, easily, I might add. It fit perfectly, I should have known.

She arranged something near the neckline, smoothed a crease, and turned me towards the mirror. My breath caught, once again.

I was beautiful.

That's the only thing I could say about what I saw in the mirror. Alice had transformed me, completely. Tears sprang to my eyes. "Thank you so much," I whispered, throwing my arms around her. She embraced me back.

"I would cry if I could," she whispered to me.

"You look amazing, Bella," Angela said, smiling. "Really."

Alice situated me on her bed. "Stay there. Don't move." She turned on Angela. "Your turn!" Ignoring Angela's insistence that she already had an outfit, Alice placed something purple in her arms and turned her in the direction of the bathroom.

I smiled. But I began thinking again. Thinking about if this was what I wanted.

So I did something stupid. I asked Alice.

"Alice?" I said, staring at my lap.

"Hmm?" She was brushing her hair, smoothing something gel-like into it.

"Do you... do you still see me becoming... one of you?" I whispered the last part.

She opened her mouth, as if to say something, then shut it. Her face went blank for a minute. "I see... the meadow... no! What?" She broke off. Concern, or maybe horror, flashed across her elf-like features, before a smile returned to her face. She continued to brush her hair. "Yes, I still see you becoming a vampire."

"Alice... what else did you see?" I demanded.

She shook her head, eyes wide with pretend innocence. "Nothing! Why?"

I glared. "Alice."

She smiled serenely and glided out of the room.

I sat nervously. _What had she seen?_ I knew it was bad, but what kind of bad? I didn't think she would lie to me about being bitten. Maybe a... complication, as Edward liked to phrase things.

Angela appeared in the doorway, looking at me shyly. She wore a lavender dress that swished around her knees with each step she took.

"Aww, Angela, so pretty!" I said, smiling. "I told you, Alice can do anything!"

She laughed. "Thank you."

We sat on the bed.

"Hey, hold on. You need those four things... that the bride always has..." she trailed off. "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue."

I thought for a minute, held out my left hand. The diamonds sparkled on my ring. "This ring is old. It's Edward's mother's."

"That's not that old..." Angela said.

I smiled to myself. If only she knew. "I think it counts," I said instead. "This dress is new."

She nodded her approval. She got up, reached into the purse she'd brought over. "Here," she said, handing me a pair of delicate turquoise earrings. "Blue and borrowed."

I slid them into my ears. "Thanks," I said. I hugged her again.

"I'll miss you when we're at college!" she said, smiling somewhat sadly. "But we can visit each other, right? And after, we can hang out."

I nodded. Now wasn't the time to tell her I would probably never see her again.

Alice reappeared then. "Angela! Perfect. I knew that purple would look amazing on you. Here, look in my closet for shoes." She gestured towards the door, then turned to me. "Bella, come here."

I went over, confused. She pulled at my hair, dusted something off of my dress. Then she leaned closer, near my ear.

"I talked to Edward and he doesn't want me to tell you this, but I will anyway," she murmured in my ear, almost too low and fast for me to understand. "About what I saw earlier." She smoothed the straps on my dress. "It's the Volturi. They're coming. Soon. I don't know exactly when, but they remember you, and they want to see if you're changed. They will kill you if you're not one of us. They're tired of us making excuses."

"What?" I shrieked. Her hand covered my mouth quickly.

"You okay, Bella?" Angela called from the closet.

"Just stabbed her with a pin!" Alice trilled.

"Then we'll do it now," I reasoned. It made sense. "If they're coming, we'll just skip the wedding and _change me now._"

"Don't be silly, Bella." Alice's voice was calm and even. "We are having this wedding. Besides, Edward wants to give you more time now that he knows you're having second thoughts."

"He promised, right after the wedding!" I whispered angrily. "Why would he think that?"

She looked at me. "Why else would you ask me if I still saw you being changed?"

I looked down at the floor. "I'm not having second thoughts," I said stubbornly.

She shook her head. "Okay. I believe you. But _he_ obviously doesn't."

"I'm going to go talk to him," I decided, heading towards the door.

"No!" Alice said, jumping in front of me. "He can't see you in your dress!"

"Fine," I grumbled, yanking a sheet of paper off of her desk.

_Edward,_ I scribbled. _I am __not__ having second thoughts. Don't even think that. You could give me all the time in the world, and my answer would still be the same. I want you to change me. I want to be with you forever. And fine, I even want to marry you. (Happy? I admitted it.) I love you, and __don't__ forget it._

_-Bella_

I folded it up. "Sorry, Angela, but could you give this to Edward?" She smiled and nodded, but looked slightly nervous at the idea of wandering alone through the Cullen's enormous home.

"Check in the kitchen," Alice advised. "He's probably still there."

When Angela was gone, the door safely shut, I turned to Alice. She was pulling on her teal bridesmaid dress. It was knee-length, made of soft chiffon and silk that floated over her petite body. It made her look even more like some sort of fairy. "Look again. What's happening now?"

"Well, since Edward wants to wait a couple weeks..." Her eyes stared into nothing for an instant. "You're dead."

I frowned. "Great. That makes me feel so much better."

She laughed. "Come on, Bella, you know he won't let anything happen to you. I'll tell him what I saw, he'll change his mind."

I shook my head. "No, it'll infuriate him even further, which will cause him to try to fight back against the Volturi, and we'll both end up dead."

She sighed, then fluffed her hair in the mirror and strapped on her shoes. "Bella, just don't worry about it! You'll be fine. We're watching out for you. You know that."

I crossed my arms. She was right, but that didn't keep me from worrying.

--

Longish chapter. Review, please!

Also. I'm going on vacation this Thursday, so I think this might be the last chapter for a few weeks. Sorry!!


	5. Oh, You Don't Have to Ask Me

This is from "You" by Evanescence

Well, I decided I would try to squeeze in one more chapter before I leave. But there won't be any until like July 7. Unless I somehow manage to write on vacation... but it's doubtful.

This is from "You" by Evanescence. Beautiful beautiful song. ("When we're together I feel perfect/When I'm pulled away from you, I fall apart ... /Marry me /promise you'll stay with me/Oh, you don't have to ask me/You know you're all that I live for...")

Oh man, oh man. Forgot the disclaimer FOREVER ago.

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters or anything from Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse. They all belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Enjoy!

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 4: Oh, You Don't Have to Ask Me**

--

I stood, tapping my foot.

"Bella, calm down," Alice told me. She straightened Charlie's tie, brushed some imaginary dust off of Carlisle's shoulder.

We were behind a curtain hung between two trees, waiting for our turn to walk down the aisle. I'd seen the set up for the wedding earlier, during the day, but I wondered how it would look now. Chairs were set up in the grass, row after row, a long aisle in the middle. At the front was a sort of altar, where we would exchange vows.

We'd decided to have a twilight wedding. Not completely dark, but dark in the sky, where it was still light on the ground. Alice had arranged for hanging lights along the walkway, just as a precaution. It was so pretty at night, somehow mysterious and comforting at the same time. It also didn't hurt that darkness made it especially easy for our vampire guests to walk around without causing alarm.

"Let's go," she said suddenly, pulling Carlisle through the curtain. Alice, of course, was my maid of honor, and Edward had chosen Carlisle as his best man.

I counted the seconds, my heart thumping erratically in my chest. Charlie squeezed my hand. "You can do this, Bella," he said, smiling. I smiled back weakly.

"Ready?" he asked, he linked his arm through mine.

I shook my head. "Never."

He chuckled, and we began walking. As we emerged on the other side of the curtain, the whole crowd stood up. My eyes widened. So many people. Was there anyone in the whole town of Forks that wasn't here?

I'd guessed most people had come because they knew Carlisle, and because of the fact that nothing exciting ever happened in Forks. But my god, that was a lot of people.

I stared at the ground. The only thought running through my mind was _don't trip._

_Don't trip. _Step. _Please, please, don't let me trip._ I slowly lifted my head, and there he was. At the front of the aisle, he stood. I stopped breathing, stopped thinking, and I think my heart stopped beating.

I immediately tripped. Charlie caught my arm as my face flushed scarlet.

He was so beautiful. Even as he let out a slight chuckle at my clumsiness, I couldn't be mad. Edward, standing there, his bronze hair waving slightly in the breeze, his black tuxedo absolutely perfect on his muscular body. His eyes shone with happiness, and another emotion I couldn't place. Was it love?

Yes, I think so.

My eyes began to mist up, a rush of something overpowering me. I don't remember walking the rest of the way up the aisle. I felt Charlie giving me a quick kiss on the cheek and then my hands were in Edwards', holding me up and keeping my legs from collapsing beneath me.

I felt so whole in that instant, so perfect, to be with this perfect creature across from me. Any resentment or anger I'd felt over this wedding washed away. I wasn't nervous, I wasn't upset, I was serene.

I wrenched my eyes away from his, gazing out into the crowd. My heart soared once more- Billy Black sat in his wheelchair, smiling proudly at me.

_Was Jacob here? _

I scanned the rows of chairs, didn't see him. I bit my lip slightly, not wanting the sadness to show on my face.

There was a bunch of kids from my class- Jessica, and Mike, and even Lauren. Angela sat next to Jessica, her pretty lavender dress shining in the dim light. I smiled at her quickly. She flashed a smile back.

And then, I saw him. He leaned against the tree, near the back, his arms folded tightly. Jake. He smiled tightly as if to say, _I'm here. Damnit._

I beamed back ecstatically, then immediately turned to Edward. His eyes were on mine, gazing at me intently. I couldn't hear the priest, I couldn't hear the whispers in the crowd of people seated in front of us, I couldn't hear the leaves in the wind. But I heard when Edward began speaking, not the traditional vows, but something different. "Bella, you are my love, my everything. I promise to honor you and love you so deeply for my whole existence."

A tear rolled down my face. I felt so amazing right now. The priest turned to me. What was I supposed to say? I could think of nothing but what I felt, and that was what poured out of my mouth. "Edward, you are my love, and my life. I will never stop loving you, for eternity." I choked the words out, more tears gathering in my eyes.

"Edward Cullen, do you take this woman, Isabella Swan, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do," he said, his voice thick with emotion.

"Isabella Swan, do you take this man, Edward Cullen, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do," I responded, my voice and my breath shaking.

"You may now kiss the bride."

He leaned towards me, I leaned towards him, and our lips met. His were cold, mine were worm and sticky with pink lip gloss. As he kissed me, all rational thoughts flew from my head, and all I wanted was to be closer to him. He pulled away, and I exhaled, letting myself breathe again.

We held hands, facing our audience of wedding guests, and everyone was clapping. I was laughing and crying, and I didn't know what else. Everything from that point forward was a blur, people hugging me, congratulating me, taking pictures. My hand never left Edward's, and his firm, cold grip kept me grounded, kept me from having a complete meltdown, and kept me from grabbing his arm, dragging him into the woods, and kissing him senseless.

Eventually, the party moved inside the Cullens' house. We ate dinner, I don't remember what. Alice had arranged all the cupcakes Angela and I had carefully frosted into a complicated but beautiful tower. She handed Edward and I each one cupcake, which we were supposed to feed to each other. I felt bad, knowing Edward wasn't exactly fond of this type of food.

But I could hardly go out and offer him blood. So I broke off a piece of cake and placed it in his mouth. He smiled, swallowed, and shoved the whole cupcake into my face.

I gasped, but laughed. Alice snapped picture after picture. Edward smiled at me and carefully wiped the frosting from my face.

Alice snapped her finger, gesturing that it was time for our first dance as a married couple.

We were married! It hadn't completely registered in my brain yet.

Edward stood up, reached for my hand, helping to pull me to my feet. We made our way over to the dance floor, which was the Cullens' living room cleared of all furniture.

Edward wrapped his arms around my waist; my arms went instinctively around his neck. The music began playing- it was my lullaby, the one he'd composed for me. I relaxed into his chest and we stood there, holding each other and swaying. People around us began dancing as well, but I didn't notice or care who it was. I wanted to stay this way for the rest of my life.

Eventually the song ended, and Edward reluctantly released me, off to find Esme. I danced with Charlie then, his eyes shining, threatening to let tears escape.

I hadn't seen my mother yet, so I talked to her and Phil for quite awhile, telling her about the wedding, about what had happened today.

I smiled at the dance floor- Esme and Carlise were dancing, along with Alice and Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett.

Somehow, Edward was dancing with Jessica Stanley, probably giving her the biggest thrill of her life. I giggled silently watching them, her face melting, his as hard as ever.

I finally mustered up enough courage to find Jake. He sat in a corner, eating what appeared to be his fourteenth cupcake.

"Dance with me?" I said shyly.

He nodded, stood up. He seemed much less mad than this morning, more relaxed. He held my hand loosely, not so possessive.

"Hey, Bella, I'm sorry," he said sheepishly, his arms around me as we moved across the floor. Us dancing was a tad awkward, due to the face that his neck was way beyond my arm's length, even in my three-inch heels. I ended up holding my arms around his waist as well. "About this morning."

"It's okay, Jake. I'm sorry, too, for making you go through this."

"Um," he said, staring at the floor. "I feel like a complete jerk saying this, Bella, but-"

I cut him off. "No, I will not kiss you," I said strongly, glaring at me.

He shook his head. "No, Bella, I think I'm over you," he said seriously.

_What?_ "Um... you are?" I asked tentatively. I wasn't objecting... but it seemed rather sudden.

"Who's that girl, right there, in the purple...?" Angela. She was nibbling on a cupcake. She saw us looking and fluttered a little wave. "I think I love her."

I gaped at him, sure he was joking. But the expression of pure love and devotion in his eyes as he gazed at her proved that he was serious.

"Did you imprint on her?" I asked, shocked.

"I don't know, but I think so," he said. "I can't explain it... I just want to go over and do anything that makes her happy. I want to see her smile. She looks so sad right now, it's killing me." He sighed dejectedly. Then, as an afterthought, "What's her name?"

"Angela." I bit my lip. Wow. This was a lot to take in all at once. "So," I said, a hint of something mean in my voice. "Me feeling completely guilty and you yelling at me, not to mention the complete pain we both felt was _nothing_?"

"Bella..." he winced.

"Jake. Seriously, if you love her, then what were you feeling for the past two years about me?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I loved you, I still do, but this... is different. More real. I don't think I ever could have imprinted on you, because you always loved your bloodsucker more. And that's not how it works." He smirked. "Why, you jealous?"

I unwrapped my arms from around him as the song ended. "Jake, get over yourself." He grinned again, kissed me on the cheek. "Go ask her to dance!" I encouraged as I stood on my toes and almost fell over trying to pat him awkwardly on the shoulder.

"Wha... what? No! I c-can't do that," he stammered. I rolled my eyes, gave him a quick hug, and found Edward again.

He eagerly held his arms open for me, kissing me on the forehead as I leaned against his icy chest. I closed my eyes, as did he. We didn't speak. It was very calming, lying there. My feelings then were indescribable. Just amazing, and perfect, and so full of love.

I wasn't sure how long it had been, I might have even fallen asleep standing there, but I opened my eyes and glanced around.

I saw Alice, glaring at Jacob as he quickly stuffed the last of the cupcakes into his mouth. I wondered where Angela was, wondered if she was okay. I saw her resolutely put down her glass of champagne and make her way over to Jacob.

I don't know if it was the feeling of being lonely or that she'd had too much champagne, but there she was, asking Jacob to dance with more confidence than I'd seen in her in a long time. Maybe she just liked him. He nodded, his face lighting up, and she led him to the center of the room.

"I take it the Jacob situation worked out?" Edward said, nodding towards Jacob and Angela.

His voice startled me. In short time I hadn't heard him speak, I'd forgotten the sheer loveliness of it.

I nodded, smiled, and pulled myself closer to him.

"I got your note, by the way," he said casually.

"And?" I asked. "You're changing me tonight, correct?"

He smiled softly. "Not tonight."

I frowned. I was starting to get tired "You promised."

"Yes, Bella, I am aware. But not tonight. We need to be in Alaska first, and of course there's our honeymoon..."

"Oh, of course," I muttered sarcastically. I was ready to skip the honeymoon.

"Bella. I just want you to be _absolutely_ sure. I don't think you fully understand what you're committing to."

I sighed, exasperated. "I _get it_, Edward. I realize that I will be in a significant amount of pain, for a long time. I know I will never be able to see my family and friends. I understand that my heart won't beat anymore and that I won't be able to cry. I recognize that my thirst for blood will control my life. I'm fully aware of all the bad things, and I'm still willing to do this. Do you know why? Because there is one good thing that makes all of that worthwhile. _You._ I will be with you forever, and that cancels out all the bad things." I took another breath. "I told you before, and I'll say this one more time. It doesn't matter how long you give me, _my answer will always be the same_._" _

Hopefully that would shut him up for awhile. He didn't speak, simply took my hand and kissed my fingertips.

"I'll say _this_ one more time, Bella. You love me far more than I deserve."

I rolled my eyes. He really could be quite the drama queen. But he had given in. I could tell, in his eyes. Satisfied, I leaned in, my body relaxing and my breathing even as we rocked gently back and forth.

"But still not tonight."

I childishly stuck out my tongue. He laughed, beautifully, musically.

I opened my eyes after awhile. It was pitch black outside. It was very late at night, or very early in the morning. People were tired, starting to gather their things together and say good-bye to their friends. I was exhausted myself, and I tried to conceal my yawn.

I forced myself to let go of Edward, taking his hand and leading him to the front of the room.

I cleared my throat. Everyone stopped talking and turned towards me. "I just wanted to say," I began, "that I am so glad all of you came tonight. Thank you so much for everything. Edward and I are leaving tonight for our honeymoon, and then we're going straight to Alaska for college. I'll miss all of you so much," I choked out, tears coming to my eyes "So it's really amazing that I got to see everyone one last time, all together, before I leave." Tears were rolling down my cheeks now. Edward pulled me to him. "And I love all of you, so much."

I looked at the floor, signaling that I was done.

I was immediately bombarded with hug after hug, whispers of "Congratulations" and "Bella, you're so sweet." I was crying full out now, emotionally overwhelmed. I'd realized earlier that it was going to be hard to wrench myself away from these people forever, but the feeling that I was going to miss them was twice as strong now.

But I was stubborn. I refused to question the decision I had made clear to Edward so many times.

Finally, everyone was gone. I had hugged Charlie and Renee extra tight, whispering how I would miss them.

"But, Bella," Renee said, somewhat surprised at how clingy I was being. "We'll see you when you visit, for Thanksgiving and Christmas and at the end of your first semester!

I didn't answer, just cried harder.

Edward stood away, pretending to talk to Alice, but really listening to me talk to my parents. He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist as I watched them walk down the driveway to their cars.

"I'm sorry you had to do that and it upset you," he whispered softly in my ear. His breath made me weak. I was glad he was holding onto me, otherwise I probably would have collapsed. "But you know you don't have to."

I let out a breath of air, whipping around and glaring. "Edward, will you shut up about this? Stop trying to convince me not to!" I was almost yelling now. He looked shocked at my sudden outburst. "You're making me feel like... like you don't want me," I said more quietly.

In an instant he was holding my face in his hands. "Bella. I _do_ want you. I love you. That is why I wanted you to marry me. I just don't want you to regret this, ever. I can't bear seeing you unhappy and I know that becoming a vampire will make you unhappy at some point."

"Being without you will make me unhappy, too. No, it'll make me more than unhappy. It'll devastate me. Even worse than the first time." I knew I was hitting low, bringing up him leaving. He still beat himself up about it, even though he knew I had forgiven him.

I stared at him, saw the pain in his eyes, and bit my lip. "Sorry. Shouldn't have brought that up."

He shook his head. "You're right," he said. "Okay. I... trust that you know what you're doing."

I smiled up at him. "Thank you." I gazed into his honey eyes, and was suddenly overcome with wanting Edward so badly that it nearly knocked me backwards.

"So," I asked lightly, facing him and holding his hands in mine. "Where exactly are we going for this oh-so-important honeymoon?"

"Well," Edward said. "I don't think we can get plane tickets anywhere tonight. We can try, of course, Alice said you were interested in Australia, or France. But tonight I just thought we could go to our meadow. Unless you don't want to."

I stood on my toes and pressed my lips to his. "That would be perfect."

--

I felt bad for Jake, so I decided to put him and Angela together. Kinda random, but I feel better about my life now that Jake is not alone. Haha.

I quite like this chapter. Kinda slow at some spots, but most of it is pretty good.

Review, please!!


	6. Our Time is Running Out

I'm back! Thanks for sticking around and waiting a week and a half.

Yay, thanks so much for reviewing, everyone! I got 15 reviews for the last chapter! That's the most I've gotten for a chapter EVER! Thanks soo so so much!! xoxo

This is an action-y chapter. At least, I think so. It'll be somewhat exciting.

This chapter title is from Our Time is Running Out by Muse. (You're something beautiful / A contradiction / ... You will be the death of me... / Our time is running out / You can't push it underground / You can't stop it screaming out)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 5: Our Time is Running Out**

We were running, even faster than usual. My arms were locked around Edward's neck so tightly, I feared that they would crack. I had forced my eyes open for a nanosecond, and everything was a blur. I felt my head spin and snapped my eyes closed. It was better not to look.

As soon as Edward had suggested the meadow, I knew that I didn't want to be anywhere else that night. Miraculously, I hadn't gotten anything on my wedding dress yet, and I intended to keep it that way. I'd made my way upstairs as fast as I could, which was rather difficult in a floor length dress, to change.

Alice was waiting for me, offering lacy nightgowns and grinning at me.

"No." There was no question here. I carefully stepped out of my dress after Alice had unzipped it. She tucked it into the garment bag and hung it up in an instant. I pulled on a pair of gray sweatpants and a pale blue tank top, throwing a denim jacket on over top.

Alice winced at my fashion choice. "Hey," I said. "I've still got on the makeup, and my hair is the same. So, that's good enough." Alice rolled her eyes, clearly having other ideas, but I ignored her.

She gave me a hug. "Have fun..." she teased.

I really hoped she wasn't seeing my future in great detail. That would be incredibly embarrassing. I made a face at her and ran back downstairs, her soft laugh fading into the background. I couldn't be away from Edward for even five minutes...

He'd changed, too, apparently much faster than me, into a pair of jeans. He still wore the same white, collared dress shirt that he'd worn with his wedding tuxedo, but he'd pushed up the sleeves to his elbows. He immediately grabbed me around the waist as soon as I was within his sight. He gently placed me in the front seat of his Volvo, buckled me in, and was in the other car door before I had even taken a breath.

And he'd stepped on the gas and we were driving. I was still trying to comprehend how we had gotten in the car so fast when the car stopped outside the woods. I didn't want to know how fast he had been going, guessing that it would have given me some sort of delayed heart attack.

He'd pulled me out and slung me on his back, and begun sprinting towards the meadow.

When we got there he set me down. I stumbled for a second, dizzy. Then I looked around. The sun was coming up, way in the distance, casting a slight glow over the whole meadow. The grass was damp, beads of water shining in the faint light. Crickets were chirping, and a few birds were calling from the tops of the trees.

I smiled, steadied myself, and sat down. Edward spread out a soft gray blanket across the grass, quickly lifting me on top of it. I lay on my back, eyes closed. I felt his weight settle next to me, and inched toward him, taking his hand. We lay there, holding hands, for several minutes. It felt like the first time we were here. Where it all started.

I turned on my side, to face him, he did the same. We were close, our noses brushing as we smiled at each other. I felt shy, like a little girl, and my eyes immediately dropped down to stare at the worn threads of the blanket. His fingers tickled my ear as he tucked a strand of hair behind it. I looked up, and was dazzled, once again, by his beautiful eyes staring into mine.

"Bella," he whispered, the sweet smell of his breath overwhelming me, so cool and soft as it tickled my face. He tentatively raised his hand, resting it on my side, on my waist. He leaned over, and kissed me tenderly but firmly. I leaned into him, wanting this perfect kiss to last.

His hand moved slowly from my waist up my side, making me shiver, to my shoulder, where he carefully pushed the jean jacket off of my shoulders. I shrugged it off, my lips still on his. I carefully brought my hand to his chest. I left my hand on the top button of his shirt, waiting for him to push me away. When he didn't, I quickly undid each button, and pressed my hands to his perfect chest. It looked as though it was sculpted out of ice, and it was just as cold.

His hand traveled back down my side, resting on my stomach now. I pulled away, took a deep breath, and leaned in, kissed him harder as he carefully pulled my tank top up over my head.

--

We lay on the blanket, holding hands again. I was once again extremely shy; I had pulled my sweatpants back on immediately.

"I knew you wouldn't hurt me," I said softly, smiling.

He smirked. "You're lucky."

"That's a first. No bad luck today," I said, feeling rather pleased with myself. Then, "Thank you." I knew it was hard for him, but I was glad it had worked out. "My final human experience." I sighed dramatically. "And it was absolutely perfect."

"And completely moral," he noted, running his fingertips across my ring.

"Of course," I said, grinning.

We lay in silence again, my fingers fluttering lightly up and down his arm. The sun was a little higher now, the sky was beautifully pink. A soft fog hovered over the meadow.

Edward sat up suddenly. He stared into a grove of trees, looking confused, then worried, and then blank. He sprang up, was suddenly dressed, and pulled me to my feet. I was dizzy, and confused.

"It's the Volturi," he said, his voice low and quiet. I could see in his eyes that thoughts were moving rapidly through his head. "Alice saw them. They're coming _now._"

I took a sharp breath. No bad luck today? I should have known something bad would happen. I'd forgotten about the Volturi. "But- Alice- she said..."

"She didn't seem them coming so soon before, but they suddenly decided to come now." He held my hand tightly, still staring off into the trees. He nodded, then turned to me. "She's running here, she just yelled for me. She's close, so I read her thoughts. The Volturi want you to be a vampire. I can try to fight them off, but the best thing for you to do is to let Alice take you. Just go with Alice when she gets here."

I blinked a few times, trying to let what he had said register in my brain. "What...?" I was so impossibly slow. My mind wasn't working. I couldn't understand. Go... with... Alice?

I heard a voice in the distance. Quiet, and so faint, maybe I imagined it. "It won't work! Bite her now!" Alice's voice. She was yelling at the top of her lungs, from far away. But she was getting closer.

Edward shook his head furiously. "No, no, no! This isn't supposed to happen..."

"I'll stay," I said. "It's okay. Just tell them you were going to bite me in a couple days."

He shook his head again. "They're sick of waiting. Aro wants you to be a vampire, but... I hate telling you this. But Jane wants to kill you. She's jealous of you, Bella, and it isn't safe."

I heard the voice again, louder now. "Bite her!"

He handed me my jean jacket and the blanket. "Just go with Alice. She's almost here. As soon as you see her, _go." _He saw my worried expression. "I'll be fine," he said.

"No, you won't!" Alice's voice was much closer, probably from a few yards away.

"Edward." My thought processing had caught up, and I understood. My voice was strangely calm, although I felt my body shaking. "Bite me now." I was scared, but I didn't want him to know.

He shook his head. "We don't have morphine, Carlisle said it would hurt less with morphine."

"Morphine won't help! You know it won't. Just bite me."

"No." He said it aloud this time. I could see that he was scared too, scared he would lose control, scared it wouldn't work. Scared of me becoming like him.

"Edward." I stared at him, my eyes boring into his.

Alice suddenly burst into the clearing. "EDWARD! BITE HER!"

He gazed at me, closed his eyes, and nodded. He looked me up and down, stared in my eyes. He pressed his nose into my hair, breathing in my scent. Then he kissed me swiftly on the lips.

He wrapped his arms around me. Then I saw a flash of white, the flash of his teeth, as he leaned towards my neck.

I gasped, the feeling of his razor sharp teeth sinking into my skin. Aside from the initial prick, it didn't hurt so bad... A warm liquid, my blood, I guessed, was trickling down my neck. Suddenly he was far away from me; I no longer felt the comforting cold aura that surrounded him.

Then the burning began. It felt like fire was spreading through my body, like my blood was boiling inside my skin. I screamed. It started in my neck, and it spread. The burning was concentrated at my neck, but there was so much of it, I could barely tell. It was Alice here now, holding my hand, and pressing her freezing skin to my neck in an attempt to stop the intense fire.

My vision faded, I could no longer see straight. Everything was dark and unclear, the brightness constantly changing from blinding to pitch black. I felt sick, it felt like the bacon grease from this morning, intensified by three hundred percent. I screamed again.

"Edward!" It was a cheery voice. Through the pain, I recognized it. Aro. "Cutting it a bit close, eh?" he asked jovially. His shadow moved from far away, to next to me. I felt the coldness radiating off of his skin, but my body was on fire and it didn't help.

He stood over me, I didn't know what he was doing. I writhed and twitched on the ground, trying to control the cry that was trying to force its way out of my mouth. Alice held my hand.

"Would it hurt less if there was more venom?" she asked, her voice cringing as she watched me in pain. "It would spread faster."

"I'm really not sure," Aro said. "I wonder. I've never tried."

Alice leaned over me, her cold skin providing a small relief, but not enough. She sunk her teeth into my wrists. It didn't hurt at all, compared to the immense fire that was scalding my insides. It burned worse where her teeth had let in more venom. I moaned, trying to close my eyes. They wouldn't shut. The pain had taken me over; I didn't have enough energy to move anything.

There were more voices, more shadows hovering over top of me. My vision got darker and darker. This was the most pain I had ever felt in my life, and there was no adrenaline to dilute it. I lay there, helpless and crying, burning and burning. I wanted to pass out, I wanted to feel nothing. But vampires don't sleep. They don't lose consciousness.

I would have to feel this pain.

"Edward," I choked out. He wasn't near me, I could tell.

"He's having a bit of an issue right now," Alice whispered in my ear. "He can't watch you suffer like this. And he tasted your blood, and he's worried he won't be able to control himself if he comes back." She pushed my hair out of my face. I was sweating, she wiped my forehead. I cried out again, unable to control it this time.

It wasn't even pain- it was _agony. _I felt like I was being tortured. I wanted to die.

But I couldn't let Edward see this. I wasn't regretting my choice. I hated this pain, but this was what I wanted.

So I lay there, my skin on fire, stiffly, screaming out when I couldn't hold it in, waiting.

--

Shorter chapter...

Sorry if Edward and Bella's sex thing was awkward, I wasn't sure how to write it, because I definitely didn't want to go into details with that. So, I probably should have said something about how Edward couldn't control himself, but I just wanted to be done with that part and move on.

Review!


	7. Sparkling Gray

Much love to reviewers

Much love to reviewers!! Thanks so much!! xoxo

I don't really like this chapter. I can't really describe Bella's pain accurately, plus I ran out of synonyms for burning and pain, so it's a little repetitive, which I hate. It also just didn't really turn out that well. Oh, well, next chapter should be better.

This chapter took FOREVER to write, but lots of music helped me write it. Thought I'd credit them-

Songs from Alexz Johnson's new album

Barcelona by Tyler Kyte, Think About Me by Ryan O'Reilly

All the songs by Sweet Thing and Blue Fox

Go to Alexz Johnson's myspace, and you'll find her music. Then click on Tyler Kyte and Sweet Thing in her top friends and listen to their music, and then from Tyler Kyte's top friends, click on Ryan O'Reilly and Blue Fox and listen to his/their songs. Some good stuff right there. Haha.

Chapter title is from The Last Song I'm Wasting on You by Evanescence. Another beautiful (but sad) song. (Sparkling gray / in my own veins / any more than a whisper / any sudden movement of my heart)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 6: Sparkling Gray**

--

The burning never stopped. It continued inside of my veins, now devoid of blood. I felt oddly cold, freezing almost, even though my skin seemed to be on fire. It hurt, so much, with as much intensity as it had in the beginning. My eyes finally were able to flutter shut, but it didn't help. I wasn't asleep, or unconscious, just unseeing, and the pain was still there.

Alice had somehow defused the situation with the Volturi, getting them to let her pick me up in her cold arms and carry me back to the Cullens' house. She'd laid me on the couch and flitted in and out of the room, occasionally talking to me and pressing cool, wet towels to my face. Her presence made me relax a tiny bit, but not enough to get rid of the pain.

Figures, the Cullens, I assumed, were in and out of the room, sitting with me and talking to me as I lay there. I felt Emmet's weight plunk down on the couch as he awkwardly patted my shoulder. Esme would knee next to me and sing incoherent lullabies, like I was her little child. I felt Rosalie's blonde braid trail across my face as she leaned over to brush my hair back. I remember hoping she wasn't mad at me before I shrieked as my body convulsed with a shot of fiery pain.

There was one person that wasn't there.

Edward.

I wasn't alone in the room, but I felt like it. I needed Edward there, holding my hand, touching my face, kissing my forehead. Even him being near me would make this whole thing better, more bearable.

Once as Alice sat with me, holding my hand, I managed to force out, "Edward...?" My lips were chapped and burning, like I had just been out in the cold for too long. I immediately regretted speaking, it hurt too much.

"I'm sorry he's not here," she said in my ear. "I told him he should be here, but he doesn't think he can handle watching you hurt and knowing that he caused it."

I was pathetic. I should be dealing with this better, I should be able to handle this. If only I could shut up, Edward would be here.

It was hard to think anything, the pain would distract me from anything in my mind. But I did know that _I had chosen this._ Any pain was my fault, and the result of all of this would make me happy. I wanted to kick myself every time I had any regret, every time I wanted to just die and end this torture.

No. This was what I wanted.

But I didn't want Edward gone.

Finally, after I don't know how long, the pain was a little less. Ever so slightly, but enough to make me hope. My body stopped writhing, convulsing on the couch, became more stiff. After a little longer, it faded and lessened until it felt like the sting of a rug burn, instead of third-degree blood boiling.

I opened my eyes. Alice was standing over me. A smile lit across her face as I blinked.

"Bella! Bella, you're awake! I knew you would be, of course, but it still helps to see you..." She smiled and held my hand. "Does it still hurt?" I started to open my mouth. "No, just nod or shake your head. Talking will hurt." I nodded. "It's okay, it'll go away soon. I'm guessing it's only a little, now that you're able to see what's going on." She smiled again. "Do you want to know what happened after Edward bit you?"

Edward. He still wasn't there.

"Where... is he?" I managed to force out, wincing as the brittle skin around my mouth stretched. Alice was right, it did hurt.

"Oh, right! I'll go find him, I hope he's still not beating himself up." She jumped up. "Esme, come watch Bella while I get Edward." She darted out of the room as Esme appeared next to me.

"Bella, darling. I'm so glad you're okay! I've seen this happen so many times, but it's still horrible to watch. Knowing that you're in pain and not being able to do anything about it. It's torture. I'm so, so sorry." She smiled at me sadly, passing her thumb across my forehead and brushing strands of hair away from my face.

I shook my head. She shouldn't feel guilty. "Not your fault..." I said, clenching my teeth at the stinging I felt when I spoke.

"Bella, you are part of our family. We would do anything for you, you know that." She looked up. "They're almost here."

Somehow, I already knew that. I felt the vibrations of their feet against the floor, heard soft but indecipherable whispers. I marveled at my vampire senses- they were amazing.

Suddenly he was next to me, kneeling at the side of the couch, holding my face in his hands. "Bella," he breathed. I melted. I forgot where I was, forgot any hurting, and smiled at him, gazing into his eyes. "I am so, so, sorry I wasn't there... I couldn't handle it. It's a pathetic, selfish excuse. I'm sorry I caused you pain and I'm sorry I hurt you," he said, staring at me.

I shook my head. "Love you," I managed, knowing that the pain of talking was worth it.

He pressed his lips to mine. "I love _you._" He looked me over. "You're still hurting. You need to rest."

"Stay, please?" I said, turning the command into a question.

"Of course," he said, smiling at me softly. "And Alice really would like to tell you what happened after I bit you." He looked toward Alice, who was bouncing up and down impatiently. He ran two fingers over my neck, the place where his venom had entered my body. I reached my fingers up, too. The skin there was perfectly smooth, and cold, the same as the rest of me. I wanted to see the scar, but not now.

He picked me up, sat down on the couch, and then cradled me in his arms. I relaxed into his shoulder, sighing contentedly.

"So," Alice said, smiling at me. "After Edward bit you, he ran off." I felt Edward tense beneath me, and brushed his arm with my thumb, trying to reassure him. "I was watching you, and trying to talk to Aro at the same thing. You heard some of what he was saying?" I nodded. "Irritating. But he was satisfied that you were bitten, we'd gone through with our part of the deal. He wanted to stay and chat, though, and we just wanted them out of there.

Jane got excited watching you writhe and scream on the ground, and tried to use her 'special talent' on you again-" Edward's grip tightened protectively around me- "- it didn't work, of course. So she took it out on me, though I hadn't done anything."

My breath caught. "I'm sorry," I whispered, wanting to cry. I hated that she had gone through that for me. Alice was right- she hadn't done anything. I remembered when Jane had done that to Edward- inflicted the torture on him. It had killed me to see the anguish in his eyes. I imagined the same expression on Alice, and I felt awful.

She waved her hand dismissively. "It already happened, don't worry about it." Jasper walked in, then, wrapped an arm around her shoulder. She continued. "Then Carlisle showed up, talked to Aro for awhile. Finally, he asked us all if he would like to join the Volturi, we all said no, he left. Then we brought you back here. You've been on this couch for three days."

Three days. What day was it now? The wedding had been Saturday evening... I'd been bitten Sunday morning. So now it was... Wednesday.

I blinked. I felt nothing now. Not just lack of pain, just nothing at all. I sat up a little on Edward's lap. He looked at my worriedly. "Bella? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine... really fine, actually." My voice shocked me. It was lower, huskier, but slightly breathy. And it was very clear, distinctive. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

I breathed in instinctively, realizing I hadn't taken a breath in about ten minutes. I hadn't needed to. With that breath, I smelled so many things I'd never smelled before. But strongest was Edward's smell... but a thousand times more powerful than I'd remembered. I leaned into him, breathing in again, not wanting to stop the scent.

I pulled away finally, then looked around. Carlisle had walked in, and now sat next to Esme. Rosalie and Emmett stood at the edge of the room, somewhat awkwardly. I looked at Rosalie. She smiled at me tentatively. I smiled shyly back.

Suddenly, there were voices. Voices everywhere. I looked wildly around the room, but no ones lips were moving.

_What was going on?_

"...Bella? Bella, what's wrong?" Esme asked worriedly. I was getting concerned looks from all sides, and it was freaking me out.

What did I say? How did I answer? Would they think I was crazy? Was this a side effect? I bit my lip. "I, um, I'm hearing a lot of voices right now."

Carlisle stared at me, as if trying to figure something out. "What kind of voices?"

I listened carefully. One was Alice's voice- "What's happening to Bella? What is she hearing?"

I bit my lip again, confused. Was I hearing her... thoughts?

I listened to the other voices. It was more or less along the same lines ("Bella? What is she hearing? Is she okay?"), but in other voices. I could make out Esme's, I could feel the concern in her voice. And then Jasper's, Rosalie's, Emmett's.

Carlisle's voice was the last I heard. His was saying so many things rapidly, I couldn't focus on one for too long, before it zipped to the next. I managed to get some of it- "Is she hearing thoughts? Could this be her gift? I think it is- but why this particular one? Are there exceptions? Can she hear everyone?"

"Bella, what kind of voices?" It was Carlisle, his real voice, asking me again.

"Yours," I said truthfully. "And Alice, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, and Esme."

Carlisle nodded. "Listen for mine again."

I tried to shut out everyone else's, and heard Carlisle clearly. "Can you hear me?" I looked, at him, his lips weren't moving. I nodded, my eyes wide. "I think you can hear thoughts, the same as Edward," his voice said again. Well, his thoughts. It wasn't his voice- it was his mind.

I looked up at Edward, knowing he had heard what Carlisle had thought as well. He took my hand, smiling at me, but looked slightly shocked.

"It's rather unusual that you have the same gift as Edward," Carlisle said, aloud now. "And you said you heard my thoughts, along with Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Esme's." He paused. "But not Edward's?"

He was right- I hadn't heard Edward's. "No..."

"And Edward can't hear your thoughts either." Carlisle furrowed his brow. "This is sort of a wild guess- but I suppose it makes sense. I think that because the bond between you and Edward is so strong, and since he is the one that bit you, he might have given you a mirror image of his gift."

I nodded slowly. It made sense. But as I realized it, I heard everyone else realize it as well. I wasn't alone in my head anymore- I would always be hearing everyone else around me thinking. It was a little disconcerting. I knew that no one would be able to hear my thoughts, but still... it made me somewhat uncomfortable.

"Don't worry, love," Edward whispered to me, squeezing my hand. "It gets irritating at times, but I think you'll find it useful, and occasionally entertaining. You'll learn to ignore it after awhile, I can show you further ways to sort of block it out."

I smiled at that. "Thank you."

I suddenly heard Alice's voice in my head, urgent. "She's going to want to hunt soon. In about... five seconds." I saw that it was directed towards Edward, but of course I heard it anyway. Hunt? What...?

Then I felt it, this intense craving, more powerful than anything I'd ever felt. It was a need for something incredibly sweet, but all the sweet things, like candy, that I could think of were suddenly unappealing.

Somehow, although I'd never tasted it before, I knew that this was a craving for blood.

--

Okay. I don't really know about Bella's "gift..." It's a little cliché, and sounds like something out of Harry Potter, lol. But whatever, I couldn't think of anything better. And I didn't want to be like "Bella can fly! She can also create force fields with her mind and turn invisible." Haha.

This was originally a lot longer, but I thought, rather than make you sit through 11 Word documents worth of words, I'd split it into two chapters.

Anyway, review!


	8. Blood in My Eyes

This chapter title is from Think About Me by Ryan O'Reilly

Thanks for reviewing, everyone! You guys keep me sane. Haha.

And just to let everyone know... in the last chapter, a lot of people pointed out that Edward probably would not have left Bella alone, and you guys are all right. I wrote it like that, and then I thought about it and was like "oh, crap." But I already wrote a ton and I'm too lazy to change it now, so... yeah. Sorry. : )

Modernxxmyth – haha. Sorry to disappoint ;)

This chapter title is from Think About Me by Ryan O'Reilly. (And the blood in my eyes / is making it so hard to see)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 8: Blood in my Eyes**

--

Everyone cleared out of the living room when they saw me, the lust for blood evident in my eyes.

"Watch her carefully, Edward," Carlisle told him seriously as he left the room. "You know what could happen." He was careful not to think of "what could happen," and I had no idea what he was talking about.

Edward only nodded. "So," he said to me, "I'm afraid we can't go after any mountain lions today, but there are quite a few dear in the woods out back. That should be good enough for now."

I shrugged. I wasn't really sure what hunting entailed, or what I wanted to, er, drink. The whole thing was a little disturbing- the fact that I would be killing an animal and drinking its blood.

He took my hand, led me out the door and into the woods. There was a sudden rush- everything was so loud. I heard birds chirping, seeming to be right in my ear. Leaves were rustling in the breeze- I heard each individual one brush against another. Every noise in that forest, I heard.

Suddenly, I felt something whip past me. It was Edward- he was off running. My eyes could actually focus on the blur of his body now. It was beautiful, watching him run. Graceful and powerful. "Catch up!" he called back to me.

I started to shake my head, of course I couldn't-

But then I remembered. _I could_. I sprinted after him, my legs moving too fast for me to see, but somehow I wans't tripping over myself, or over anything for that matter. I was in front of him now, laughing as I looked behind me. I slowed down, waited for him to find me. I wasn't tired, nothing was sore. I hadn't felt any strain, but I had been going so fast.

Moments later, he was next to me, holding my hand again. "Do you like running now?" he asked, smirking.

I nodded and girnned. "Very much." I could see why he liked it, and that it was better than walking. You got where you wanted to be so much faster. A human would have taken about 15 minutes to walk from the Cullens' house into the woods where we were now, and we'd run there in about 30 seconds.

He looked around, then led me a little farther into the forest. "There's a deer over there- do you hear it?" He gestured quickly with his right hand, through a thick grove of trees.

I stared out at the trees, following the direction of his hand. I did hear it. It had to be about 30 feet away, but I heard its feet sink into the muddy ground and leaves rustle against its body. It sounded as though it was tearing berries off of a bush. I heard a crack, the sound of its teeth clamping around a branch and snapping it off. I turned back to Edward, nodded.

"I can go first, if you'd like, to show you what to do..." he trailed off, looking to see my reaction.

I stopped listening. The sweet scent of the deer's blood finally made it through the trees, washing over me. I hissed slightly. The smell, all I could think of was the smell. The deer, I needed its blood. I sprang forward, something hitting me as I shot towards it.

Was this adrenaline? Did vampires have adrenaline? This rush, this craving... it was perfect. Amazing. My eyes were wild, my hair was catching in branches and trees, and I heard crashes in my head as I hurtled towards my prey.

It began to run in the opposite direction, but I caught up easily. My teeth were sinking into its body before it realized that I was next to it. I heard it squeal, but it barely registered while I was drinking the blood out of the animal. It tasted... so... good. Nothing I'd ever had was as good as this, and nothing would compare. I finished drinking, lapping up the last drops with my tongue.

Edward was near me, a few feet away, chuckling softly. I closed my eyes, savoring the taste, and turned towards him. "How'd I do?" I asked shyly.

"Pretty good, for the first time. You might want to control yourself a little next time..." He smirked, gestured behind us. I turned. The grove of trees had a strange jagged hole in it, as if a bulldozer and driven through them.

Edward was still laughing quietly, raising his eyebrows at me. I was confused. How...?

Oh. That bulldozer was me. The crashes I'd heard weren't actually in my head- they were trees falling to the forest floor. I marveled, staring at my perfectly unscathed skin. I hadn't even felt myself knock down three thick, full grown trees. I smiled sheepishly. "Oops..."

He laughed. "You did well. Sometimes it's overwhelming, I know. You'll be better with practice."

I bit my lip. "Hopefully. I still manage to break things, even now. At least I didn't get hurt."

"It's okay, Bella. Don't worry so much. Still thirsty?"

I was. That deer's blood was sustaining for the moment, but not nearly enough. We wandered further, until we came across another deer.

"Try to find your path before you strike this time," Edward advised. "You'll have more of a surprise element when you don't make a lot of noise, and you won't have to chase it so far."

I nodded. The deer was standing by a small stream of water, drinking. There were trees in front of it. I moved to the left to avoid them this time as the scent hit me, but I lunged towards it with as much force and power as before. It didn't have a chance to to run this time, I was there too quickly and drinking the blood from its body. I was hunched over as I drained the carcass, straightening up when I was done.

"Much better," Edward called to me, keeping a safe distance.

I smiled, but then I noticed the pool of water, and my reflection. I hadn't yet seen myself- but even in the rippling water, I was surprised. My skin was paler than it had ever been, almost white, and so smooth. No imperfections- even the bacon grease burn on my forehead was gone. There were two smooth, silvery crescent shaped marks on my neck- where Edward had bitten me. My hair was shinier than it had been when I was human. What really struck me, though, was my eyes.

I didn't know what I had been expecting- but there they were, bright, bloody red. There was sort of a wild insanity in them, along with something deeper, more malicious.

But even with scary and somewhat disturbing red eyes, there was no doubt about it- I was extremely, inhumanly beautiful.

"Surprised?" Edward said, as I looked away.

I nodded mutely.

"You've always been beautiful, of course," he said. He was walking towards me, a funny sort of smile on his face. "But this, I can't explain it. This is a new standard of beauty, no one can compare."

I smiled shyly back, and using my new fast reflexes, I was next to him in an instant, and we were kissing. His arms were around me, and he was pushing me backwards against a tree. His arms moved from around my waist to my arms, and he was gripping them, running his hands up and down. I breathed in the scent of him- I loved being able to smell it so strongly now.

But with the scent of Edward came something else- something sweet. Blood. I'd thought nothing could compare to the deer, but this was even better. So much better. So much sweeter. The scent of it became stronger, my lust for it became more intense.

Edward sensed my distraction, pulled away. Then a look of surprise flashed across his face and he smelled it too.

It must be another deer. It was probably bigger- that's why the scent was so much better. It was getting closer. A stronger wave of the scent, and I was off running. I needed it, I needed it. All I could think of was the blood, the taste...

"Bella, no!" Edward yelled behind me, but I didn't care why, didn't care that he was telling me to stop.

I sprinted forward, following the scent. Probably bursting through more trees or more leaves, but that didn't matter. All that mattered was the blood. The smell was getting stronger, and as I emerged past two evergreens, I found the source.

A human.

It was a young boy, probably about 16, wearing a backpack and glasses. His thoughts were confused, whiny, typical boy. _Why did they tell me to go in the woods? They haven't done hazing to be on the football team for ten years. Damn, I'm probably going to get attacked by a bear or something. I'm scared. This is so embarassing..._

I had a chance to tell what he was thinking, to be taken aback by the fact that it wasn't an animal. But then I smelled it again, and it didn't matter what he was, I just needed the blood. I lunged forward, hissing. A look of terror flashed across his face as he saw me, my face snarling.

Suddenly, I was no longer moving. A strong hand was clamped around my arm. I struggled to push past it, this irritating restriction. Another hand grasped my other arm, but I was hissing and snarling, trying to get to the boy and his sweet blood.

"Run. Now." It was Edward. The boy, hesitated, fear lighting his eyes as he stared at me. "GO!" Edward roared. The boy turned and sprinted away, not looking back.

"Edward- stop-" I struggled against him, I felt his grip loosening, I was almost free. I wanted that boy. So badly. More than anything.

"Bella." His voice was calm, serious, but strong. "Stop_."_

I stopped. His tone shocked me. "Why? Edward, I need it... let me go after him!"

"No, Bella. I know that you want it, believe me, I do too."

"Then let's go! We can still catch up to him." I was baffled as to why we weren't both running after him, sharing the blood.

"Bella, listen to me." He gently turned my face away from the woods, the direction where the boy had run, and towards him. "I know it's hard- but you need to resist it."

Why? It was too good, why not just drink it?

"Rememeber- vegetarians?" he asked, using the sarcastic term for vampires that don't drink human blood.

I felt something click in my brain. _Human._ It hit me. I couldn't drink a human's blood. It was wrong- it would be killing someone. Someone like Charlie, or Renee. What if next time it _was_ Charlie or Renee? It shocked me to think that I was seconds away from causing someone's death. I breathed in sharply.

"I'm sorry," I said softly, looking down at the ground.

"Bella, Bella, it's okay, love. It happens. You'll get over it."

"No, it's not okay, Edward! I can't kill anyone! What if it was someone I knew? Keep me away from humans. I can't hurt anyone..."

His arms were wrapped around me, holding me close. "It's okay. It's hard to resist. You'll learn. It would have worked out better if we were in Alaska. But since there were... complications with your change, we'll make due with what we have. We'll all look out for you, Bella, we'll do our best."

"I love you," I said, looking up at him, smiling. "So much."

"And I you," he replied, pressing his lips to mine once again.

--

Really random I know, but did anyone watch Degrassi last night? I almost cried for Sean. He was so cute. And it was sad.

Oh, well, whatever, never mind.

Review!


	9. Sin on Sin

This chapter is from 2am by Alexz Johnson

Kath- THANK YOU. You don't know how much that made my day :)

Modernxxmyth- Hahahaha. I would have missed Degrassi for a Harry Potter convention, too.

And all your other reviews made my day too!! Thanks so so so much. Don't hesitate to criticize, though. I need all the help I can get. :)

This chapter is from 2am by Alexz Johnson. (You kissed me into ruins / sin on sin)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 9: Sin on Sin**

--

The next couple days went by slowly. I mostly stayed inside, terrified that I would go crazy if I smelled a human. But it was so boring... and not being able to sleep made the days drag on and on.

The Cullens' were... entertaining, to say the last. They were always yelling at each other, making jokes, fighting, or doing something. Since they were around each other constantly, they'd learned to put up with each other.

And when they weren't speaking, I heard their thoughts. It was rather interesting, to be able to know exactly what everyone was thinking at any given moment. It let me know so much more about each Cullen then they'd ever shared with me when I was human. I learned about each transformation in even more detail, understanding the pain and every other emotion they'd felt at the time. I heard about what they thought of themselves and about their relationships with each other.

And along with all the serious things, I heard their random thoughts, memories, and feelings. They were genuinely happy, sane vampires, which struck me as a tad ironic.

I'd also learned each of their scents. Everyone's scent was different, I noticed, and now I could tell who had walked into a room without looking, simply by smelling.

I'd grown much closer to Jasper. He hadn't been able to be around me much as a human, but now, he talked to me quite often. He'd hugged me as soon as he'd seen that I was a vampire. It was nice that he could touch me now. He was like an older brother, the nice one that I could talk to about anything.

Every time I was in a room with Emmett, I ended up laughing. He was funny, funnier than I'd thought. He was never boring. He and Rosalie fought all the time, but it was hilarious to watch and they were never mad for long. His thoughts were even funnier, mostly random pranks he wanted to pull, but never ended up following through.

Rosalie and I were getting along slightly better. I could see in her eyes (and her thoughts) that she still didn't like my decision. But she was coming around. She was starting to stop holding it against me, and know me for who I was, not for the choices I made. We weren't as close as Alice and I, and I didn't think we ever would be, but it was getting better.

Alice treated me as a living Barbie. She was always slathering my face with makeup products, trying out different styles on my hair. She'd made it her mission to pick out my clothes every morning, so I was forced to walk around in the outfits she'd selected.

Nights were the worst. It was dark, and I couldn't pass the time by sleeping. Edward was always there, of course, and we talked quite a bit, among other things. He told me more about his life as a human, which I found intriguing.

But we didn't always need to talk. Sometimes we would just lie there silently, holding each other. It wasn't an awkward silence, it was comforting and nice.

Edward would also teach me more about blocking out thoughts. "If you just focus on your thoughts, or on something specific, it helps. Imagine a brick wall around your mind, and only your thoughts are inside. It makes the other thoughts fade out slightly, where you can only hear them faintly, and they're easier to ignore."

I practiced sometimes, when I was in a room with the rest of the Cullen's. Edward's tips were actually quite helpful. It wasn't as overwhelming now, and I wasn't bombarded with voices every time I entered a room.

After the third day of being inside, the blood cravings came back. Alice knew it, and had already told Edward by the time I'd realized I wanted blood.

"Bella, you have to hunt," he told me, stroking my hair.

I shook my head, refusing. "I can't," I said simply, crossing my arms. I couldn't risk anyone's life, just for blood. "I'll be fine."

"No, you won't. You'll go crazy. Vampires need blood. Right now, you're starving yourself. You need to hunt." But I was adamant. He sighed, exasperated. "What can I do? Bring a deer here for you?"

"That would be helpful," I said sarcastically.

He sighed again. "Well, I'm going. Jasper and I will only be gone for a couple hours. See you soon, love." He kissed my cheek and headed out the door.

I bit my lip, worried I'd made him mad. Alice took the opportunity of me being alone to rush in with more hair products. "He's not mad!" she chirped cheerfully. Then she laughed. "It'll work out," she said, a mischievous glint in her eye, and began chattering about something else. I wasn't really paying attention, more focused on her vision.

Just as Alice wrapped up her fourth extremely long story, I smelled Edward. I smiled. I sniffed again. The scent of blood came with him. It was calling me, telling me to run to it. It wasn't the blood of a human, so I figured that he just smelled slightly... bloody after hunting.

"Look outside," Alice said, a smile playing at the corner of her lips. I got up from my spot on the floor and looked out the window. Edward stood, staring up at me, gripping a rather large deer in his arms. It was still alive, struggling and writhing against him every few seconds, but it was a lost effort. It appeared to be tired- obviously it had been doing this for awhile. Edward's grip was tight.

"I'd rather not bring it in," he called, grinning at me. "Think you can manage to step outside for a minute?"

A smile lit across my face as I threw open the window and catapulted myself out of it. Somehow I landed lightly on my feet, the drop jarring me slightly but not causing pain.

"You could have used the stairs," Alice yelled from above me, her head sticking out of the window.

I barely heard her, the blood was overwhelming me. I jumped towards the deer that was still in Edward's arms, and he released it, stepping backwards. The deer stumbled slightly, and I took the chance to dig my hands into its back to hold it still, and sink my teeth into its body. I drank thirstily- why had I refused to taste this? I needed it.

I was done, the blood was all gone. I let myself calm down. I could never get used to this adrenaline I felt when I was drinking blood.

I was touched. He'd actually carried a deer home for me, he cared about me that much.

I giggled. I was touched that he'd brought me a deer. It sounded so strange.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," I said, smiling. "Thanks."

He reached over, enveloped me in his arms. "See, you did need it."

"I wasn't serious when I said you should bring a deer here," I muttered into his shoulder.

"Neither was I. But then I thought, why not?" He chuckled softly. "I wonder how long it would have taken you to cave and go hunt."

"Four more days!" Alice called from somewhere inside the house.

"You shouldn't wait that long, especially as a newborn."

I shrugged.

"Stubborn as always," Edward replied, grinning, and kissing me. I melted and was about to collapse, my legs growing weaker. He cheerfully scooped me up and carried me to his room, not breaking our kiss.

--

So it wasn't all that boring. It took some getting used to, but it got better every day.

That night as we lay in Edward's... well, _our _bed talking, he brought up hunting again.

"Can you please try to go?" he said softly, his cool breath tickling the side of my face.

I didn't say anything.

"Please, Bella?" he asked again, his lips on my ear.

"That's not fair..." I said, trailing off as he planted kisses all over the side of my face.

"What's not?" he feigned innocence, twining our fingers together.

"You know." I turned away so my back was towards him, but I still held on to his hand.

"I really don't," he said, a smile in his voice, tugging me back over to face him. "I just want you," he paused, kissed me, "to go..." Kiss. "hunting." Kiss, kiss, kiss.

I tried to resist him, but it was useless. "I can't," I whispered.

"Yes, you can, Bella. Don't doubt yourself so much. I know it's hard, and it might get harder, but you can't just hide from this. To put it simply, you're a vampire now, and you need blood."

"Okay," I sighed, biting my bottom lip. "Tomorrow. I'll try."

"Thank you, Bella. That's all I'm asking. Try." He leaned over me, kissing me again and again until I was dizzy and all thoughts of hunting left my mind.

The next morning, my stomach dropped. Why had I let that manipulative vampire convince me to go? I sighed.

"Ready?" he asked, grinning as I walked downstairs.

"No," I replied, glaring. I wished I could have a normal morning, where I stumbled around blearily until I had a bowl of cheerios and a glass of orange juice. Instead of this.

He chuckled, wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Alice is coming, too. She wants to see you hunt."

Great.

We headed out, the three of us, into the woods. The sounds and smells overwhelmed me once again, but I tried to focus.

"Let's see if you can find the deer this time, Bella," Edward said encouragingly. "Use your smell, track the scent."

He had to make this even harder. I sighed, but breathed in the air. There was a brief but sweet scent, way in the distance on the left. "Over here," I muttered, and began to chase the scent. I heard their faint footsteps behind me, soft in the muddy earth.

I found the deer within seconds, had pounced, and was drinking hungrily before Edward or Alice had even caught up. It was a pack of them, they scattered as soon as they saw me attack one of their herd. I finished with the first, and chased after another.

I felt much, much better now.

Edward caught up, his hand on my shoulder. "See, Bella, you're fine, and you did great."

I didn't want to admit that he was right, so I changed the subject. "Where's Alice?"

"She's thirsty, too. She found another deer. See if you can smell her and find her."

I breathed in, trying to remember what Alice smelled like. There was a faint trace of a familiar scent, and I walked swiftly towards it. It became stronger, I was getting closer. But I stopped, pausing, as Edward caught up with me.

There was another scent, deeper into the woods. I'd smelled it before, but it seemed so much sweeter now. It was heaven, compared to this deer, and I needed it. I began to run after it.

"Bella, Bella, stop it!" Alice was calling after me, and I heard her feet behind me, chasing me. Another set of footsteps was with her, and I recognized the scent- Edward.

"Bella!" It was his velvety voice, trying to coax me back, away from the blood.

But I didn't care. I truly and honestly didn't care. I blocked out Edward's voice, Alice's voice, and ran faster. I was almost there, the scent was so strong. I heard the thoughts of someone up ahead, just outside the woods. The sharp odor of cigarette smoke burned my nose.

_Hope no one notices I'm gone. I hate this job, they don't pay me enough._

He was a construction worker, I noted as I got closer. Skipping work. It had started off as a lunch break, progressed into a lunch hour, and he couldn't resist finishing it up by going off for a smoke in the woods.

I was almost there now, when suddenly I felt myself pitching forward, face planting in the dirt. I hissed, spitting the dirt out of my mouth. I felt myself being turned over, my arms pinned to the ground.

Alice and Edward hovered over me, their arms strong. "Bella. Stop. Focus." It was Alice, her voice calm and strong in my ear.

I hissed again, tried to get up off the ground. The scent was wavering in the air, taunting me. Why were they torturing me? Just let me have it, just let me go. It'll be over in a minute. What harm could come of it? Just let me go.

"Stop, Bella." They were treating me like a child. I heard the man sigh, just a little ways away. His breath traveled through the trees and towards me, and as I breathed it in, I felt a sudden volt of power, adrenaline maybe, surge through me.

I threw my head forward, snapping my teeth at anything within reach. They connected, I felt them close around something hard and cold. It was sort of a blind rage, all I could see were the trees preventing me from getting the blood. I threw my arms forward, knocked myself free. I heard something slam and something fall as I growled, racing towards the trees.

The human was facing me, and I had time to see his face turn to shock and his mouth open slightly before I knocked him backwards and my mouth was at his shoulder, draining him of blood.

I was in heaven. The sensation of this warm, sweet, delicious blood running down my throat was the most perfect feeling I'd ever had. It was like a high, and I never wanted it to end. I quickly lapped the blood up, my eyes closing in pure bliss. The deer I'd had before were nothing compared to this. How had I let myself miss out? I sucked out the last few drops and leaned back, wishing there was more.

The blood made me stronger, made my senses more in tune. I drew in a breath, calming myself. The high was still there, but I could focus now, I had found the blood I needed and I was satisfied.

I heard a moan in the forest, and the reality of what I'd just done crashed down around me.

"You're fine, Edward, it's just a bite." It was Alice's voice. I heard leaves crunch under her feet, heard Edward moan again.

"Don't touch it," he said sharply. "Go get her. I'll tell Carlisle."

"I'm fine, too, thanks," she said sarcastically. "I only got thrown into a tree."

"Go get her. You don't know what else she could do!"

"Actually, I do," Alice's voice replied. "She'll be fine."

"Alice! Go!"

Alice sighed, and I heard her feet begin to move quickly towards me.

This wasn't heaven, this was hell. And I needed to get out of here.

I turned around and ran.

--

I'm not sure how well I did with that chapter... I feel extremely repetitive every time I describe Bella hunting. Well, whatever. Review, tell me what you think!


	10. Courtside to this Nightmare

I felt sick

Holy shitocki mushrooms! This story got nominated for Twilight Fanfiction Awards! My goodness, I am extremely surprised. Thanks so much to whoever nominated it! Much much love to you. Xoxoxoxoxo. Um, vote for me please?

Graghhh. I have no idea why I didn't realize this earlier, but about Bella's transformation chapter... DUMB because Aro never leaves Volterra, so I have no idea why he would be there. Sorry. Blehh.

This story is almost over! Gasp. I've finished writing- one more chapter and an epilogue should do it. But I started getting bored of it, so the next chapters are kinda bad. And everyone has been giving me such good reviews, I will definitely try to fix them up and make them better!

This chapter title is from "I Am Fred Astaire" by Taking Back Sunday. (And you know a whole lot of this / it could have been avoided when / you were courtside to this nightmare)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 9: Courtside to This Nightmare **

--

I felt sick. I wanted to throw up, but of course I couldn't. I had killed a human, I had taken their life. It made me feel dirty, disgusting.

_I killed someone._

How had I let that happen? I had no self control. I hated myself, I couldn't stand it. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time- but all I had been thinking about was the blood, not what would happen after.

I sprinted through the trees, not sure where exactly to go. I didn't want Alice or Edward to find me, I couldn't face them.

Not after what I'd done.

They'd trusted me and had so much faith in me, and I had attacked them- bitten Edward, thrown Alice into a tree- just for blood. And if course it was blood I wasn't supposed to have- a human's.

_I killed someone._

The thought kept flashing through my head, making me wince.

I wanted to cry, but of course I couldn't do that either. I ran in circles, in and out of trees, trying to confuse my scent so Edward and Alice wouldn't be able to find it. I finally collapsed against a tree, my body heaving with dry sobs.

Edward hated me now, I was sure of it. I'd hurt him! I'd gone against the values of his entire family.

And _I'd killed someone._

I shuddered slightly to myself. I'd never thought I could be capable of doing something so awful. Causing someone to die. Another wave of sobs wracked through me. It was strange, not having tears rolling down my cheeks. My eyes weren't even wet.

I sat against that tree, staring at my feet. I couldn't sit out here forever.

Where could I go?

I calmed down a little, thought about it logically. Not to Charlie's. That would cause some problems, beginning with the fact that I had red eyes, and ending with the fact that I would probably want to drink his blood. That ruled out all of my friends from school, and all humans in general. Which left me with non-humans. Namely, werewolves. Jacob Black.

He wasn't human, and I didn't think I would have an urge to drink his blood. Edward always said werewolves smelled disgusting to vampires, and I didn't think I was an exception.

The only problem with this would be the boundaries... the treaty. Vampires weren't allowed to go into werewolf territory.

But maybe there would be an exception for me? Since I knew them all so well.

I got rid of that thought, imagining Sam's face every time he was forced to be in contact with a vampire. I was pretty sure there wouldn't be an exception.

So I would have to be sneaky about it. It would be difficult, with over 10 werewolves trained to kill newborn vampires with super in tune senses. I wasn't sure how to hide my smell, so I didn't even attempt it.

But I'd already risked everything by _killing a human,_ what did it matter now?

It didn't. I shot off towards La Push, hoping this would work.

As soon as I crossed the border, a moldy smell hit my nose. It smelled like a dog, but more powerful, and even more disgusting. It made me gag slightly, made me want to throw up. I brought my sleeve to my nose, breathing in the scent of Alice, who had picked out the top for me.

I kept running until I was outside of Jake's house. "Jake!" I called, hoping he would hear me.

No response. I crept around the side of the house, looking in the window. Billy sat in his wheelchair, watching some sort of game on TV, with Charlie.

I backed up immediately, before I could smell the blood. Crap. I'd forgotten that humans would be here.

I ran backwards, towards the woods. I sat there, calming myself down.

Then I set off towards the beach. I'd hoped the wolves wouldn't smell me, but they were bound to at some point.

The smell got stronger and I gagged again, scrunching up my nose.

I finally made it to the beach and glanced around. Quil and Embry were there, along with Jake. And Angela. They were messing around, laughing, throwing rocks in the water. I backed up a little. Their disgusting scent was masking hers, which was a small blessing.

They looked up sharply, suddenly smelling me.

_Vampire,_ I heard in Jake's mind.

"Jake! It's me. It's Bella," I called. Maybe he would hear.

He did. "Bella?" he came a little closer, but his smell made me back up. Angela stood up, confused, and followed him.

_Who is that up there? Why did he say Bella? I know he used to like her, but she got married. I hope he still doesn't like her... I really like him. _Angela was confused, but wary of me, as she should be.

"Hold on, Angela," he said to her, and sprang towards me. _What is going on? Is that really Bella? She smells disgusting. Well, she would since she's constantly around those bloodsuckers. Holy..._ His thoughts trailed off as he got closer. _She's one of them._

"Bella- you- why- what?" He sputtered. "Get out of here! Do you not remember the treaty? Not to mention the fact that you just told us all that your leech family just broke it! You cannot be here!"

"Jake, I need to talk to you-"

Suddenly, Angela was behind him. "Jacob, what's wrong?" Then she took a closer look. "_Bella?_ Is that you?"

Her smell was starting to make its way past Jake's powerful odor. I couldn't let myself lose control twice, especially to someone I cared about. "Get her out of here," I hissed, fighting my craving as hard as I possibly could.

"Angela, go back to the beach," he said.

Angela looked hurt. _What's wrong? Why is he up here with Bella? Why is she here anyway? Why are her eyes red?_

I winced, I couldn't let her find out anymore. This was way too dangerous for her. Her smell hit me a little harder now, but it wasn't as strong because she smelled so much like a _dog. _But I backed up again.

"Jake, her smell..."

He stepped protectively in front of her, shielding her from me. "Just go back to the border, I'll meet you there in ten minutes, once I take her home."

I nodded and whirled around, running back off into the woods.

What had possessed me to do this? I couldn't be here! This was one of the worst ideas I had ever had. I should have just gone back to the Cullen's, I should have just waited.

Oh, god. I'd screwed this up so much more now. Seeing Jacob had not been a good idea. I should have known- I couldn't cross over into the werewolves' territory, but that wasn't the worst of it.

The terms of the treaty were that the Cullens' would never bite a human.

And they had. It would have been a secret, but by my talking to Jake, the werewolves now knew.

I'd unknowingly set up a war between vampires and wolves. I leaned into a tree, arms wrapped over my head.

I was a horrible, horrible person. I began to shudder again, sobs causing my body to heave. What more could I do wrong today? How else could I screw this life up? I hadn't yet been a vampire a week, and I had already managed to make everyone hate me, to put more people's lives in danger.

Suddenly, I heard footsteps, and thoughts, and smelled that disgusting wet dog odor.

_What was she thinking? How could this have happened? I can't let her get hurt. I wouldn't mind fighting with the leeches, but she's one of them... and it would end up hurting her, too. How am I supposed to keep this from Sam?_

"Jake?" I said softly, leaning back from the tree.

He moved closer, came into my view. "Hey, Bella." His nose wrinkled. "Ew, Bella. You smell absolutely disgusting."

I glared at him. "So do you," I said icily.

"Hey, calm down. So what's the deal? What happened? Why are you here? Man, Bella, you've really screwed this up. I don't want to go to war with the leeches, but man, I know Sam will go crazy when he finds out they bit you."

I poured out the whole story, the Volturi, my transformation, and ended with how I had attacked Edward and Alice so I could bite a human and kill him.

"Shit, Bella," he gasped, his eyes wide. "A person? You killed a person? I can't... I can't believe that."

I lowered my eyes. "I didn't mean to, I swear! You wouldn't get it. It's so hard. It's like... I have to constantly smell the blood. And it's just so appealing, I can't resist it. I've been hunting deer mainly, but that human, he was right there, and I was thirsty, and it just smelled so good." I hung my head. "It sounds pathetic, but... it's just such a strong craving. You wouldn't get it," I repeated.

_How can she live with herself? I don't know what I would do if I killed someone. Well, I have killed... we'll just say vampires don't count. Shit, I don't even know what I would do if I had to worry about accidentally killing people constantly. _He shuddered slightly, then stared at me.

"Thanks, Jake, thanks a lot," I said, shooting daggers. "I don't _know_ how I'm going to live with myself! Especially since I have to deal with it _forever_. Can you be any nicer about this? Edward probably hates me right now, and I didn't know what else to do. Okay?"

"Uh... what?"

Crap. He hadn't said that aloud. "Nothing. Just... hearing your thoughts. Didn't mean to freak you out."

_God, she can read minds TOO? This sucks!_

"Not for me," I hissed, angry he wasn't being helpful.. "Let's see what else I can find in there?"

_No, Bella, come on! Um, I'm not thinking of anything, I'm thinking of Angela. It's working out pretty great, I'm glad I met her... Bella, come on, give it up._

I sighed- he was trying to block his thoughts. "Glad it's working out with Angela," I said softly. I couldn't stay mad at him.

"Me, too." _I really, really love her. She's amazing, and beautiful, and I don't know what I was doing before I met her._

"How much does she know?" I asked, wondering what problems I'd caused by showing up and looking crazy.

"Er, a little. She knows I think werewolves are real, and she knows all of the stories. You know, the ones you heard at the bonfire. She gets scared easily, and I'm not sure how she'll take the fact that I'm a werewolf..."

"Oh. So she knows nothing about vampires?" I winced. "I'm sorry, Jake. Just tell her it wasn't me that you were talking to."

"I tried, but it was hard lying to her. She doesn't believe me."

"Well, what are you going to do?"

"Bella, I have no effing idea."

We stood in silence for awhile, a bit awkwardly.

"Well... what are _we_ going to do?" I asked finally.

He shook his head. "I don't know. I can only keep it from Sam until I phase... there's no way I can hide it longer than that."

"Is there any way we can talk to him?" I asked, biting my lip. "Since, you know, it was a special circumstance. I would have been killed if they hadn't bitten me. And since I wasn't _technically_ a part of the treaty, it wouldn't have mattered that I crossed the border... or bit a person." It was a stretch, and I knew it, but it was worth a try.

Jacob looked doubtful. "It might work," he said, but not very convincingly.

"Look, I don't know what else to do. And seeing as that's the only plan we have, can we just try?"

He sighed. "Fine, I'll go get Sam. Stay here. Please, don't kill anyone else."

I wished I could make that promise. I just nodded.

"Really try, Bella." He disappeared off into the trees.

I stood there, my nails digging into the tree. What could I do? What was I supposed to do? I wanted Edward to be there, helping me. He would think of something, and he would help me.

But I couldn't possibly face him.

I'd bitten him! There would be a scar on his arm from _me._

Jacob returned a few minutes later, hiding guiltily behind a seething Sam. Sam looked angry, but it was nothing compared to what he was thinking. He couldn't form full sentences, and his disjointed thoughts were punctuated with growls and curses.

_How dare they... those filthy bloodsuckers... the treaty! Biting a human... never trust again... war..._

His steps were furious, pounding in the earth. He growled louder, inhumanly, when he saw me. _And of course it's _her,_ that irritating little girl who causes so many problems. She puts us all in danger. And kills a person? Why aren't they keeping tabs on her? They need to be watching her. _He clenched his teeth.

"You broke the treaty." It was blunt, outright, and dripping with hatred.

"Umm..." I didn't know what to say.

"On three counts!" he yelled. "First, your Cullen bit a person- you. Then, you, a vampire, bite another person. And then to top it all off, you cross the border."

I still couldn't think of a response. Jacob was behind him, staring at the ground. _I feel bad for her... I wish he would calm down a little. Though I do admit, she does deserve it. She's had it coming. Why did she drag us into this? I still can't believe what she's done. _

I looked up, glared at Jacob. _Stay out of my thoughts! _He shot towards me in his mind. I glared again.

"Do you realize what you've done? Do you know what we're allowed to do now? You have completely disregarded the treaty. We're entitled to do whatever we want. No more boundaries. No more staying in La Push. We could expose all of you as vampires. We could... start a war against your side. And there're more of us then there are of you. Now that you've given us lessons in how to defeat a vampire, it would be so much easier." He stared at me, piercing.

"Sam..." I tried. "I would have died if Edward hadn't bitten me. The Vol- um, a group of vampires were going to kill me unless I became like them. The Cullens were only watching out for me."

"By making you one of _them_?" Sam asked incredulously.

"It's what I wanted," I said softly.

"He should have asked us first." Sam was stubborn.

"We didn't have time... the ones that wanted me were already there. Look, Sam, Edward didn't want to bite me either, but he didn't want to lose me forever. What would you have done if it was Emily?"

His face softened slightly, his thoughts ran to the scars on Emily's face and of how he would feel if he lost her. _If I was going to lose her... I would make the same choice._

I took my chance and forged ahead. "And... I wasn't really part of the treaty. So, I didn't really violate it by... biting a person, or by crossing the border." I bit my lip, hoping it would work.

Sam shook his head. "It doesn't matter. The Cullen's are responsible for all vampires on their land. And since they chose to let you live there, _your_ actions are reflected on them." His voice was hard again, unchanging.

_I'm not giving in to this girl. She made the choice, and it gives us another reason not to trust those parasites._

"You don't understand!" I was shrieking now, my voice high pitched and crazy. I probably wasn't helping my case. "I didn't mean to bite a person. It's not like I suddenly decided to kill someone. Their blood was calling me, it made me!"

"You should have tried harder."

"I can't!" I said. "You don't get it, you don't get how hard it is. Try to think of it from my perspective. Think of it- like your need for food. If I don't drink blood, I am starving myself. And would you rather have... vegetables every day, or a giant hamburger? If you had eaten broccoli and lettuce for your whole life, but you loved the taste of meat, what would you do if there was suddenly a plate of beef in front of you?"

I didn't know if that made sense. But if it did, it was one of the best analogies I'd ever come up with, and hopefully it would help a little. I calmed myself down, taking a breath. I realized that I'd stopped breathing to avoid the moldy scent of werewolf, and immediately stopped again once the scent of it filled my nose again.

_That can't possibly be the same as blood. I could resist it. If I knew eating meat would hurt someone, I would resist it. _Sam's was adamant. He just glared.

"Sam, please. Please, please, please. Do you need a war right now? What would that accomplish? It wouldn't help with anything. We're going to leave soon, anyway. We're going to wait it out, until I can manage my cravings, and then we're going as far away from Forks as we can. Come on, we haven't hurt you, and we don't plan to. We won't come near you or talk to you or anything. Please, Sam." I was rambling, begging, pleading. Saying the first thing to come out of my mouth, hoping it contributed to my case.

He was mulling it over. His expression was still the same, but his thoughts were going crazy. _She's right. I won't tell her, but a war would be stupid. I just threw it out there to rile her up. I can't excuse that the treaty was broken, though. It's centuries old, really meaningful, and they violated it just to save a human. But I can't accuse them of that, They're supposed to be bad. We protect people, not them. But they broke the treaty. We need something from them. We have to get something out of this._

"Okay."

He'd made a decision. I didn't let the joy show on my face.

"I understand the circumstances, but it still doesn't excuse the fact that you broke the treaty. Since you broke the treaty, we have permission to do whatever we'd like with you and the other vampires, but for the moment, things are going to remain as is. We will try to look past it. _You_ need to get back to your vampires, and _they_ need to keep better tabs on you. We'll discuss it with the head of your clan further, since he seems to be the most reasonable out of all of you." Sam nodded curtly. "Don't come back to La Push."

With that, he turned on his heel and disappeared off into the forest.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

--

Um.

Not really sure about this chapter.

Any thoughts?


	11. This Gets Harder

Sorry for the lameness of the last chapter. I thought about re-doing it, but unfortunately, I am way too lazy.

Yayy I love reviews. Um. I just wanted to say, that it would probably make my life if I got 100 reviews on this! That would be the most reviews I've ever gotten EVER. So... can you guys try for me? Por favor? Thaanks!! :)

This chapter is from "It's Not a Fashion Statement, it's a Deathwish" by My Chemical Romance. (Do you remember that day when we met? / you told me this get's harder. Well, it did.)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Chapter 10: This Gets Harder**

--

Sam had given in, but I didn't feel any of the satisfaction of winning.

Not like this, not without Edward. There was no way to fix this, my stupidity. He couldn't possibly forgive me.

"We have to call your leeches. Before they do something stupid. They're probably already running all over the place looking for you, and Sam does not need to open his front door to see one of them asking for you." Jacob held up his small silver cell phone.

"Jake... no..." I begged, my eyes pleading with him.

"Bells, we have to. I'd rather not either. But I'm trying to be responsible here."

"He probably hates me!" I wailed, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Doesn't matter. What's his number?"

I sighed, but rattled it off. Jacob punched it into the phone, and we stood there, listening to it ring.

"This is Edward?" Jake snapped before Edward could say anything.

"Yes. This is Jacob?" Edward replied coolly. Although he was speaking at normal volume, my vampire senses enabled me to hear his voice through the phone.

"Yeah. We have Bella," Jacob said bluntly.

"You..._ have_ her?" Edward's voice came out a little strangled. "Is she okay? What are you doing to her?"

"NOTHING! I would NEVER hurt her!" _Unlike you,_ I heard in his thoughts.

"Jake, focus!" I hissed.

"Is that her? Is she there? Let me talk to her!" Edward demanded.

I shook my head, but Jacob had already pressed the phone to my ear.

"Bella, is that you?" Edward asked.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I know it doesn't help, but I am such a horrible person. I'm sorry I bit you, and tell Alice I'm sorry for hurting her, too," I took a breath.

"Bella..."

I ignored him, kept rambling. "I understand that you hate me, and everyone else probably does too, and I'm just so mad at myself. I don't have any self control and it sucks, and I wish I'd never bitten a person."

"Bella."

"And then I totally messed up and I was so stupid and I forgot about the treaty... and I put you all in danger. I worked out the treaty thing, but that doesn't make up for anything, and-"

"Bella!" I stopped talking. "I'm not... mad at you. And I could never hate you. You need to come back, though. So we can discuss this more. Please, just let me come get you and take you home."

His calm voice made me relax. I nodded, but then remembered I was on the phone. "Okay," I whispered. I handed the phone back to Jake.

"I realize we've broken the treaty," Edward said slowly.

"Yeah, well, Bella talked to Sam, and Sam's pissed as hell, but he wants to work something out with Carlisle."

"That sounds reasonable. I'll let him know, expect a call later. I'll be there in five minutes. Tell Bella I love her." Jacob snapped the phone shut.

"He'll be here soon." He made a face. "And... he... lovesyou." Jacob mumbled.

"I know."

_Of course she did, she can read my mind._

"Actually, I heard it over the phone," I said, smiling slightly.

_Even better._

I smiled again. "Thanks, Jake." I inched towards him, holding my arms out. He hugged me tightly. _I miss this,_ his thoughts said happily.

"Me too," I whispered to him. It struck me then that I had no urge to drink his blood. Even when I _was _breathing, his blood made me want to throw up more than anything. Maybe being friends with a werewolf wouldn't be that hard.

I pulled away and he wrinkled his nose. "Man, Bella, you stink!"

"Like I said before, so do you. I haven't breathed this whole time just so I don't have to smell you!"

"You can do that?" he asked incredulously, his eyes bugging.

"Of course. Vampires don't need silly things like _oxygen._" I smirked. It was fun, joking around with Jake. He made a face.

"Listen, about Angela... just tell her," I told him, hearing the worry that had never left his mind. "She doesn't judge easily. She was really nice to me, even when everyone else at school wasn't. And she was even willing to get to know the Cullens. She's sweet. Just tell her, I think it'll work out."

He looked at me, hesitating. "You sure?"

"Yeah. Go over after Edward gets here, tell her. But don't tell her about me, she can't know about vampires. Just tell her... Edward and I had a fight, and I came back here, but it worked out. And tell her to call me. On Edward's cell phone." It was a bit of a stretch, but it might work.

"I don't want to put her in danger," he said firmly, folding his arms.

"Believe me, neither do I. I've caused enough problems. I just want to say hi, see how she's doing. I won't come anywhere near her."

This seemed to satisfy him.

Suddenly, I heard the crunch of footsteps, way off in the woods, and I began to smell the sweet scent of Edward.

So did Jake. He wrinkled his nose further. _Ew. That's gross. Why do they all have to smell so disgusting?_

I let it slide as Edward emerged from the forest. He ran straight for me and enveloped me in a hug. "I missed you," was the first thing he said, his eyes shut tightly, his lips in my hair.

I breathed, letting go of anxiety and worry. All that mattered was that Edward was here and everything was better.

"I'm sorry," I whispered back, my eyes closed as well, feeling horrible once again. He finally let go, stepping back to look at me. "You smell like a dog," he whispered.

I smirked slightly as Jacob growled angrily. _How dare he say that... it's only okay when she says it!_

Edward turned to Jake. "Thank you, Jacob. For looking out for her."

Jake nodded tersely. "You need to watch her more closely. You can't let her run away like that."

"I'm not a child," I hissed, folding my arms.

Edward stared at me, and I could see so much in his eyes, but all he said was "Hmm."

I bit my lip. "Bye, Jake," I said, staring at my feet.

"See you, Bells. Be careful. Don't kill anyone else, please? For me." _Hey, I know you can hear this. I'll miss you. I'll see you soon, okay? Once you can stop killing everyone in sight, that is. Even if he won't let you._

"Sure," I nodded. "Of course, Jake." He'd forgotten that Edward could hear, too, so there was really no point in sending me a thought message.

One last wave, and Edward was tugging me along into the forest. He scooped me up onto his back, looped my arms around his neck.

"Hey..." I protested. "I can run."

"I want to talk to you," he said. He started running, quickly, sprinting around trees until we were deep in the forest. He let me down and turned to face me.

I winced, staring at the twigs and leaves on the ground, nudging the dirt with my foot. "Whatever you say, I know I deserve it."

His voice was short, frustrated. "You _were_ acting like a child. I know blood is hard to resist. Believe me, Bella. I _know._ We all do, and we don't blame you for that. But you can't just run away like that. You have to own up to it. You can't leave every time something goes wrong."

"That's what you do," I bit back, but instantly regretted it. Why did I always bring that up? I didn't want to hurt him, I hated it.

"It happened once," he said firmly. "And I swore to you it would never happen again. And I still promise that. Let's make this your _one_ time, too."

He'd never been mad at me before. He always blamed himself, never me. But there was no way around that this was my fault. "I'm sorry," I murmured for the hundredth time. "I didn't mean to kill that person. I feel horrible... it was just the blood."

He laughed unevenly. "You don't get it, Bella! I don't care about the human. It happens to all of us. I know it's hard to resist. I'm mad, no, not even mad. I'm upset and _hurt_ that you didn't trust me enough to know that I would always be there for you. You felt like you needed to run away."

He took a breath. "You are my life, Bella. I would not have spent the last three years of my existence with you, I would not have married you, if I wasn't always going to be there."

He dropped me to the ground, pressing his lips to mine forcefully. I felt the familiar sensation of my heart pounding in my ears as he kissed me, even though it wasn't beating. I was breathing heavily as he let go.

"Oh," I said stupidly.

"You're so clueless sometimes," he said, smiling, planting kisses on my cheeks, up and down my jaw line.

"Hey!" I said, folding my arms and making a face.

"You know it's true," he said, still flashing the crooked smile, and kissing me again.

I sighed, knowing he was right. I never seemed to notice silly things like this.

I followed him back to the house, running myself this time. I still couldn't get over the rush that I felt as the wind whip through my hair and whirled around my body.

"You're in for an earful," Edward muttered to me.

As if I didn't already know. All the thoughts are heard almost knocked me backwards when they hit me, full of anger and frustration.

_Is she okay? Bella, dear, oh, darling. She must feel horrible. _This from Esme. She was comforting, motherly. I flashed her a smile as I entered the house and she hugged me to her.

_I knew she would screw up. And she did. Look what it's done to us! She's my sister now, and I accept that, but... I knew she shouldn't have been bitten. _Rosalie. Any progress we'd made had vanished.

Jasper was surprisingly understanding. _I know how she feels. I would give anything to taste human blood again... but I know how to control myself. _

I was jostled slightly as Alice launched herself at me, hugging me tightly. "Bella! You're okay! But that was so _stupid. _You can't ever do that again, do you understand me?" The little pixie's voice was fierce, her eyes boring into mine.

"I won't," I promised.

"I thought you were going to be okay," she muttered, her eyes slightly sad. "I saw you running in the woods, and I figured I'd catch you eventually. But then you suddenly decided to go to La Push," I could hear the distaste in her voice, "and your future disappeared. Sorry I didn't get you in time."

"It's not your fault, Alice!" I said, hugging her. "_I'm_ the one who should be sorry."

Carlisle was the worst, though. _I'm surprised, Bella, _he told me silently. That was enough, all he had to say.

I nodded, wincing. Edward heard as well, pulled me close to him.

Everyone was gathered in their living room. I couldn't get my feet to move, to go stand in the room with them. Edward tugged my arm slightly, then sighed, picked me up, and sat me down on the couch next to him.

They were all staring at me. "I-I..." I stuttered. "I'm sorry." It was all I could think of to say.

_You should be,_ Rosalie bit at me in her head, her expression icy.

"I know I've said it a lot," I continued. "But I really feel awful. I let all of you down, and you believed in me and tried to help. And then I left, and put you all in danger by going to La Push. It was stupid, and irresponsible, and I'll never do it again." I felt like a little kid, apologizing to her parents.

_Damn right, you won't. _Emmett was folding his arms, face frowning, but I could tell that he was ready to forgive me. Emmett didn't hold grudges for long. _Bella, it's cool. They'll all come around. I'll help you out with Rose. _He winked at me swiftly, then resumed his original expression.

"It's serious, what you did, Bella," Carlisle said to me. His voice was calm, but firm. "No so much the human, because we all slip sometimes." Not him, of course. Carlisle had never tasted human blood. "In fact, it was bound to happen. But it turned out alright. Alice saw that the man didn't have family, or many friends. There will be a missing person's report filed, but in few months, everyone will forget."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I felt bad for the man, and it was sad that no one would miss him, but at least I hadn't caused pain for any loved ones.

"It's that you ran away, when we needed you to be here so we could watch out for you. What if you had come across more humans? You don't know how to hunt carefully yet, what if someone had seen you? And on top of that, you went back on a treaty that is centuries old. What would make you go to La Push?"

"Jacob... I didn't know where else to go," I whispered, knowing it sounded pathetic.

"Sam Uley called. He's upset with us for breaking the treaty. He was sort of hinting at extinguishing the boundaries and letting the wolves do what they want if they crossed us, but he doesn't want to cause any problems. He just wants us to move as soon as we're able to. I think that's reasonable, and we were going to move anyway."

His expression softened. "He said you spoke with him. I do appreciate that Bella. Thank you for taking responsibility for that."

Edward turned towards me now. "Bella... it's hard for me to say this, because I don't want you to get hurt..."

_He's not even helping her! _I looked towards Jasper. He was trying to send out waves of calm, trying to smooth everything over, but he couldn't conceal the tiny bit of irritation and ended up sending that out along with the attempt at tranquility.

I turned towards Jasper. "Would you like to say something?" I asked icily. He couldn't help but make me feel irritated, too.

"Yeah, actually. Sorry, Edward, but you're beating around the bush. I'm going to tell it like it is, Bella, but you can't get mad at me." Jasper looked meaningfully at Edward.

"I think I can handle this-"

"No, you can't." He cut Edward off, turned to me.

"Bella, this is hard. I'm not ever going to tell you it's not. And so what? You made a mistake. But by making that mistake, you've just made it a hell of a lot harder for yourself, because once you taste human blood, the craving for it will always be stronger. Just know that you're going to have to try a lot harder now.

"But you're going to get through it. We've got all the time in the world- literally- for you to learn to control it. Okay? We're going to do our best to help you, but you have to make the effort, too."

I nodded mutely. I understood.

"Well," Rosalie said, smirking slightly. _You'll be fine, Bella. _Her thoughts were surprisingly light, she appeared to have forgiven me. "I guess we know that Jasper won the bet!"

--

Referring to the bet Jasper and Emmett made in Eclipse about how many times Bella would slip up.

Er, I'm not sure how good this chapter is but hopefully it was better than the last one.

Haha I just got really excited because I realized Breaking Dawn comes out IN A WEEK! I am definitely getting the book at midnight.

Anyway. I think this is it! Just the epilogue left. :)


	12. Heading for the Sun

Yayy! 100 reviews! Thanks so much! Much love to all of you.

I was thinking of writing another chapter, but I just want to end this, so I'll make the epilogue sort of long. :)

This chapter title is from Ultraviolet by Alexz Johnson, just to finish it off. :)

--

**Ultraviolet**

**Epilogue: Heading for the Sun**

--

The door to Edward's room burst open. "Ready for school, Bella?" Alice trilled, grinning at me.

I made a face. "No."

She laughed and hauled me out of bed, away from Edward. "Hey..." I protested as she dragged me into her room. Images of a makeover that I definitely didn't want danced through her head. Along with it was a vision she'd seen of me walking down the hall next to Edward in jeans and some sort of be-dazzled top. I had to admit I didn't look bad, but I glared at her as she tossed them to me and ordered me to put them on.

I quickly shrugged into the jeans (way too tight) and the top (way too flashy), eager to find Edward again, and headed for the door.

"Not yet!" Alice said, pulling me backwards and attacking my hair with a curling iron.

One too many minutes later, she was done. I glanced at myself in the mirror, liking what I saw. My hair looked pretty, done up in curls like this. "Thanks, Alice," I grumbled reluctantly as I left the room.

"I knew you'd like it!" she called as she skipped after me, grinning away. She was already dressed, of course, in jeans and a top similar to mine.

As I wandered slowly down the stairs, it suddenly hit me that in less than an hour, I was going to be _surrounded by humans for six hours straight._ My breathing became shallow and uneven and I stopped walking. Alice slammed into me, but I didn't move from the step.

"Bella, you'll be okay!" she said, immediately guessing what I was feeling and hugging me tightly. "We'll be here for you." She pulled me down the last few stairs and through the hall.

Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper were waiting for us in the kitchen, and I suddenly felt myself calm down. I shot Jasper a grateful look and he grinned back.

"Good morning," Esme said pleasantly, breezing into the room, a warm smile on her face. She kissed each of our cheeks in turn, hugging me extra tightly.

We stood in the kitchen, comparing class schedules and talking quietly. I tried half-heartedly to join in the conversation, but I couldn't stop worrying about what would happen at school.

My foot tapped nervously, and my teeth clenched harder on my lip. Edward squeezed my hand, sending me unspoken reassurances that somehow calmed me more than Jasper. But it still wasn't enough.

Edward checked his watch. "School starts in twenty minutes," he said, looking around the room.

"Are we taking two cars?" Emmett asked. "There's not enough room in the Volvo for all of us."

"I'll sit in your lap," Rosalie purred to him, smirking. Emmett grinned back, and I tried desperately to block out their thoughts. I gave Edward a pained glance, and he responded with a similar one.

Alice wrinkled her nose. "How about not," she suggested.

"We'll take two cars." Edward made the final decision, grabbing his keys and tossing another set to Rosalie.

"We're going with you," Jasper told Edward and I, tugging Alice's hand forward.

"I don't blame you," Edward said, taking my hand and leading me out the door. We both winced, having to hear the thoughts running through Emmett's head, which were definitely not G-rated. Or even PG-13, for that matter.

Edward held the passenger door of the Volvo open for me.

"Why does she get shotgun?" Alice whined, but I knew she didn't really care.

"I like her more," Edward said, somehow managing to grin at me and pull out of the driveway at the same time, going a speed so high I preferred not to know. I rolled my eyes, but grinned stupidly back.

"Are you ready for this?" We were roaring down the road, and I was staring at my lap nervously, despite the calm Jasper was trying to send towards me.

He still drove fast. He'd been trying to teach me, but I hadn't yet gotten the hang of it. Every time I pushed past 80 I lost control of the car and couldn't turn very well, which of course was problematic. I stuck to letting Edward drive.

This school looked a little like the one in Forks, just as small. Once again, the shiny silver Volvo stuck out in the sea of old trucks. Just then Rosalie's red convertible pealed into the parking lot and stopped next to us, causing several heads to turn.

Edward rolled his eyes, muttered something that sounded like "show-off" while Alice laughed quietly in the back seta. He pulled the keys out of the ignition and I stepped out of the car.

The air smelled like humans, like blood. It wasn't strong yet, but it was enough to draw the venom into my teeth, for it to collect in my mouth. I shook my head, trying to clear it.

Edward took my hand, leading me towards the school, Alice and Jasper close behind. Rosalie and Emmett were busy in her car, doing who knows what.

As soon as we entered the building, I was hit with the scents, the sweet delicious scents, and the thoughts. They were everywhere, from every direction.

_...my first class? Room 104?..._

_Who're the new kids?_

_...wish I'd brought another sweater..._

_...those girls are hot..._

_Which floor is..._

_...those guys are gorgeous..._

_...forgot my lunch..._

It was dizzying, overwhelming. I felt unsteady on my feet, but Edward wrapped his arm around me to hold me still. It distracted me from the smell of their blood, but not enough to make me feel like this would be okay.

Edward led me towards our first class. I hadn't even taken out my classes list, but he had memorized our schedules and the whole floor plan of the school. He'd managed to get us every class together, which was extremely helpful. He would be there to hold me back, to keep me focused.

The thoughts of humans were entertaining. As the teacher mumbled out a lecture about a subject I was sure I already knew, I listened to the people around me. Most of their thoughts were on us, very few actually paying attention to the lesson.

_...gorgeous, are they related?_

_I think they're dating._

_Why is their skin so pale?_

_...I have no idea what this teacher is talking about..._

_...she looks so scared! Probably nervous... _

_...hungry. When's lunch?_

I smirked.

Suddenly Edward placed his hand on my knee, causing me to jump, then giggle slightly.

The teacher's gaze jumped to me, shooting me a disapproving look. "Do you know the answer, Ms..." He checked his list, "Cullen?" I blinked- it was strange being referred to as a Cullen. But I liked it.

I had no idea of the question, but the answer was stated clearly in his thoughts. I fed it back to him, changing a few words. I realized that reading minds would be especially helpful with schoolwork.

The teacher was surprised. "Very good." He continued talking, I continued to not listen.

I glared at Edward. "Thanks," I said sarcastically, my voice too low for anyone around me to hear.

"You're quite welcome," he replied cheerfully, his voice equally low.

By lunch, the scent of the people had dulled slightly, I was getting used to it. It wasn't as tempting now, since I'd been forced to smell it for three hours straight.

I sat with the rest of the Cullens- my siblings. We each carried a tray, with as little food on it as possible.

People were already beginning to peg us as weird.

_...do they not eat?_

_Why don't they have any food?_

_I bet they're all anorexic. That's why they're so pale..._

I wasn't sure what paleness had to do with eating disorders, but I ignored their thoughts. I was content, sitting there, listening to Alice tell some story about a girl who told her she looked like a fairy.

Suddenly a girl walked by, shaking out her long blonde hair flirtatiously, obviously meant for Edward to notice. The scent hit me hard. It was sweet and strong, and calling to me.

I jumped up, and not subtly. People stared at me, and Edward hand was suddenly gripping my wrist, preventing me from moving any further.

"Bella, what are you doing?" Rosalie asked, rolling her eyes. The smell was gone now, just a mist of its remnants hanging in the air.

I sat back down. "I saw a bug," I said loudly for the benefit of the humans around me. I took a deep breath. I'd been _this_ close to losing it, right here in front of all these people.

"Have you begun to regret this yet?" Edward murmured in my ear, almost sadly. He still held my arm, just as a precaution.

I took a deep breath, inhaling his scent and feeling better again. "No, actually. Not at all."

It was the truth- this was what I had wanted, and I knew if I had to do it all over, I would choose this again.

He kissed my lightly on the lips, making me forget the smell of all the humans surrounding me, making me melt against him. I smiled softly, closed my eyes.

"I love you," I whispered.

--

IT'S OVER! (Sorry for the semi-lame ending. :P)

Yay! I'm surprised this story made it this far. I have a commitment issues when it comes to writing. This is the second multiple-chapter story I've actually finished. Ha.

Hope you guys liked it! Thanks for sticking around and reading it through the end. It wasn't as good as I wanted it to be, but whatever.

Check out other stories I'm working on- Sky Fits Heaven and Reverie. They're slightly better than this. ;)


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